Monday, 30 November 2015

Raring to go!

NOT!!! It's Monday and it's back to work! And I don't seem to have done any of the things I was supposed to apart from washing and cooking!
Oh well never mind this week is another week.

Yesterday morning as you know, after an early trip to the gym, I listened to the end of the Day/night test in Adelaide and  can only say that it was real 'hearts in mouth' stuff as Australia beat New Zealia ( as they are known in the chateau).
It seems that the concept of day/night test cricket was a success with record crowds and the horror of the 'pink ball' seemed to have fallen by the wayside.
My one fear.....................that they may decide to now play tests in 'coloured clothing'. Which would really demean the game in the eyes of this purist.
Cricket is about leather of on willow ( preferable red leather) and gentlemen in white clothing ( which is actually cream but hey ho!)

England are back in action this afternoon with the 3rd T20 match and I for one am hoping that Liam Plunkett again does well which will be one in the eye for the selectors!

This week should be a busy one in Super swanky Lady Lainey office as we are fighting against the tide with the number of new jobs that are heading our way. Looks like the archiving and nail filing may be on hold for a few days.

I am planning my weekend also as I am thinking about putting up the Christmas decorations....................yes really!! Maybe this time the boxes will be emptied when thy are taken out of the garage instead of being looked at and put back away.

The last few years have been rough and Christmas was not the joyous time that had been experienced in the past, however I am going to make a very determined effort to change that.
 I am not going to the gym this evening as I have things to do ready for tomorrow and so am putting it on hold until Wednesday.

I am also hoping that the fixtures finally appear this week so that I can get super organised for next season.

And now I need to get super organised and head off to said office to shout at boys, drink copious amounts of green tea and work my little fingers to the bone.

Yes I do work sometimes!!!!

Sunday, 29 November 2015

Sunny Sunday

Hahaha that got you, you thought that I was basking in sunshine when in actual fact it it hosing it down with rain and freezing cold!
I am just back from the gym where I have been flexing and contracting my bicep, triceps, quads, glutes and abs...............................I am guessing that I will not be fit for anything tomorrow.
However no pain, no gain and I need to do something about my level of fitness.

I have just put a load of washing in the machine although where I am going to dry it is beyond me!!! I have my smalls laid all over the place!

Over in Australia, my boys are on the ways to victory as they bowled New Zealia out for 208.
I am listening as I am typing and feeling a tad excited.

Yesterday was a bit of a busy day for me as washing was done ( with a real ale induced hangover) and then off to do the shopping. It was all go in the chateau.

I watched a DVD which I had been meaning to make the time to watch . 'Gone Girl'...........if you haven't seen it them you really should!

And what about today........................well I am of to do the weekly shop, and then  home to wrap up some pressies ready for posting off this week. I know it is early but some people are either a long way away, or off on  holibobs for Xmas.

OMG, Kane Williamson has just taken a catch and Mitchell Marsh s gone! great catch by the tiny tyke, but come on you baggy greens.

Anyhooo back to the order of the day. I also have emptied my wardrobe of dresses that have been purchased and never worn and so I am stuffing them onto ebay this afternoon. I may as well make some money and someone may as well get to wear them. The bed in the spare room cannot be seen for the amount of things that I have cleared out.

I am determined to stream line my life as soon as possible.

Australia look to be having everyone hanging on and I can tell yo I am feeling pretty sick.

I am now off to go and watch the end of the match which should be very soon as they need 22 more runs to win.

see you tomorrow

Saturday, 28 November 2015


Oh my head, a night down at Darlington Cricket clubs  1st beer festival seemed like a good idea, this morning however it is a different matter.Francesca and I had a brilliant time and really enjoyed ourselves.

I did however sleep through the 2nd day of the  Australia v New Zealia at 3am, and so I am busy trying to catch up ( which will include more catching up this afternoon through shut eyes on the sofa).
After my 'baggy greens' bowled NZ out for 202 they were themselves bowled out for 224, New zealia are now 22 without loss.

come on my boys!

England had a bit of 'tip and run' last night as the 2nd T20 match took place. :Lots of speculation re the team which to be honest in my eyes only Plunkett stood out.with 3-33.
They won by 3 runs which must have made for some match. I will not be watching it though.

The jury in the Chris Cairns trial have been sent home for the weekend, having been 'out; since Wednesday. They either cannot really make their minds up or the food that is being provided is that good that they are trying to hang it out for a bit longer.

India won overall in the series against South Africa, which is a shame for the lads, as their next opponents are England who at the moment think that they are invincible. Only time will tell.

I have washing in and  despite several pints of 'Sneklifter' ( or shirt lifter as Franny was calling it by the end of the night), plus a few pints of 'Dogs Bollock' I was still able to operate the dishwasher last night, however it does need emptying this morning. ( OMG I have to bend down!!!!)

I also have to go to Homebase and the post office and the shops and.........................well I think that a lie down is in order now!

Until tomorrow when I hope that I will be feeling a little more 'Ladylike'.

Friday, 27 November 2015

Fantastic F(ryan)day

Thank flip it is F(ryan)day and I can wind down and have a chilled out weekend................................after I have been to the beer Festival with Francesca at Darlington CC tonight, ahh yes that  will be an evening and a half!!!! ( or make that 8 pints and a half!!!!)

But before then I have to get through today.
And having been up since 2.30am so that I could tune into the very first day/night test match complete with a pink ball, I have to say that even a dunk in the shower at did little to wake me up, but it's cricket, it's Australia and I am loving it.

What I am not loving is that the old duffers at the ECB are scrapping the coin toss in both divisions of the county championship. It's to be hoped that the Umpires, remember as this is usually the only thing that they get right!
And Andrew Strauss had a big part in this , so I have been trying to find out how many tosses he won? that might be the clue to the decision.

Some statistician somewhere will have that figure, however its not me!

In the test down under, New Zealia won the toss and elected to bat, and at lunch are now 80-2. Tiny Tyke Kane Williamson hit 22 before falling to Starc.
I can see that I am not going to have as chilled out a weekend as I thought as I will be up at strange hours to watch my Aussie boys.

What I do know is that I have to go and get a new washing line tomorrow as I am sick of having my 'smalls' hanging around the chateau, the other one finally kicked its legs ( or arms) up at the end of the summer. And you all know how 'funny' I am about getting my washing done and dried.

I am super excited as Dame Didi's Christmas present came yesterday and it is lovely, I was so excited that I phoned her and wanted to tell her straight away, but as she is now sick of getting her birthday presents in May ( her birthday is in September) and her Xmas pressies as soon as I have got them, she was having none of it!!!!
So I guess that I will have to wrap it up and wait for the day!

Right I am off to super swanky Lady Lainey office and Pony Paul is picking me up as there is no way I can drive home after a bucket of real ale!

Thursday, 26 November 2015

OK no ranting today.......I hope

This is one of my (selection) of  favourite photos from the 2015 season. My hair even make Jonnys  hair look decidedly dull!!!!
Just a couple of seconds before this photo was taken Jonny muttered those immortal words to Sam and I,  'give it 'ere' as he took my phone off me to take a picture!!  This one was taken by Simon who was keeping a watchful eye on the two of us.
I had already fallen through a gate onto the pitch and lost my hotel key only to have it retrieved by Glenn Maxwell.

Yes I know you have heard it all before and believe me you will be reliving it again at the end of the year, when more of my favourite pictures will be released.

I have been continuing with the clear out and started after the weekend from hell. and I  have now managed to remove some 'deadwood' from my life and after making it very clear that there was no place in my life for the persons concerned I went to bed last night and slept like a log ( what ever a log sleeps like).
Today I feel like I can take on the world or at least the office boys!
It's amazing how strong the words 'no room for you' are.!

We are getting very close to one year since the tragic loss of Phillip Hughes, who's death sent shock waves through cricket worldwide.
Have there been changes made in cricket?
Not according to Stuart Broad, he does not believe that cricketers have changed the way that they play, but seeing a badly shaken Mitchell Johnson after Morgan was taken off the field after being struck on the head in the summer I would say that there is a great deal of fear at the back of bowlers minds.
I think that the psychological effects of the accident will be long stay with the  current players world wide.

This afternoon England are in T20 action so no doubt I will be tuning in when I get home from the office.
Not been able to find any team news of of yet, but imagine that they will release it at a 'normal' hour!

And that really is it for today.

see you on F(ryan)day

Wednesday, 25 November 2015

Wow it's Wednesday!

I can't believe that it is Wednesday already and I am  up to my eyes in Christmas cake and  housework. Its never ending. I can't wait until we finish at Christmas and I get a rest. I know one thing for sure, I will not be getting up at silly times and feeling tired all day!

I am very tired though of all the proposed changes to the game of cricket, first they are thinking of using a pink ball in some matches, the red ball was fine for a hundred odd years and then they introduced a white ball, why don't they just have a rainbow of balls and you choose before the start of the game.

They are also tomorrow going to discuss the scrapping of the toss!!! It will be down to the away team to choose if they want to bat or bowl . Hell they could also let them choose the colour of the ball!
If this is agreed it could be run out in a one year trial from next season.

The toss will remain in domestic and limited overs cricket, so that leaves T20 and Test Matches????
If it happens in T20 then the away team could choose a ball to match their 'pyjamas'.

The toss was mentioned in the first recorded laws from 1744.
I suspect that the  'eedjits' that want to scrap it, have gained their place on the ECB's executive committee by working in a high flying role and having lots of money and the only cricket that they had ever seen was usually from the bottom of a glass at a corporate hospitality day. #myopiniononly

NUMPTY's why are they trying to change something that had been fine for over 270 years #purist.

I know lets have a game where every county are winners at the start of the season and then share the Trophy until the start of the next when they pass it round again. That's fair isn't it!!!

seriously do they idiots have nothing better to do. may be they should try to sort out match fixing and drug taking and .........

ooohhhhh dear there I go!!! off on a rant already!!!!

And talking about match fixing, the jury are out in the Chris Cairns trial. Today could be the day!

Right I am off to have a large coffee and then hit the road!

Until tomorrow

Tuesday, 24 November 2015

Tuesday Tidy out

So today I am having another huge clear out but it is in Super Swanky Lady Lainey office, there are boxes of rubbish in the spare office and as we are getting a new draughtsman soon  we need to make some space.

I am also still having the clear out at the ch√Ęteau, you would have thought that it would be empty by now.............but sadly it isn't and I am now hoping that I can do this in time for Pere Noel.

Yesterday was very cold and we discovered that the toilet was broken at the office too. Not sure what  the cleaner had been doing over the weekend. We will not be getting a new loo until the end of the week!!!!

I ask you!!! it would never happen at London HQ that they were without a toilet!

We were not drinking anything throughout the day to stop the need to spend a penny, then when the 'lot' in the offices downstairs go home we went and used theirs!!!!

Not an ideal situation!

My Tykes were back in training yesterday and preparing for the new season. It makes it all feel closer when this is happening.

Some of them look as if they have been over indulging in their time off and look a bit more'fluff' than 'buff'.

His Royal Ryanness was sporting a pair of knee high white socks. now I am never one to comment on his dress sense as usually when in 'civvies' he looks very smart. I am not sure the look he was going for, it was more 'Japanese school girl' than 'mighty wicket taker'

They all looked to be in high spirits, just like going back to school after the summer holidays.
Gillespie the Gallant was chatting about their training and how they are all back ready to get match fit.
Well add an extra one onto the team, as I am too.

England played a warm up T20 match yesterday and they let Liam Plunkett have a little bowl. He must have been sick of being the water boy.

England won but to be honest if they hadn't then questions needed to be asked!

Today has dawned as cold as yesterday so I think that the thermals will be order of the day especially as our ineffectual heating at Super Swanky Lady Lainey office means that it is often colder inside than out!

right off to go and do my thing.

Monday, 23 November 2015

new week, new start

How many times have you heard this is the time you have been reading the blog.
Well the funny thing is this, this time it is true.
This is why..........

1. I tend to get roped in to do things for friends that I don't really want to do and usually end up very much worse off.

2. I am drawn into something that appears to help me in some way, and turns out to be a complete waste of time, effort and usually means that I am worse off.

3. I rarely have a weekend just for me and am getting  very very tired which I tend to do at this time of year anyway.And usually end up worse off.

4. I was brought up to help other people, share, be kind to animals ( I was so kind I even married one!). And usually end up in someway, worse off.

I am guessing that you can see the pattern here and being worse off does not always mean financially.

So from today, I am not volunteering to helpout so rapidly ( I am honouring the dates in my diary), I am taking as many weekends as possible solely for me ( although December is very busy already). and I am going to bed every night at 9pm!!!

OK less of me and more of................................OMG 'HWMNBNITB'!! has only gone into press saying that he is responsible for making Reece Topley 'famous'. is there no end to the ego/mouth of this man. I am surprises that he hasn't claimed  to be responsible for Botham doing so well in the 1981 Ashes.

I am not a fan of this man as you all know, but is there no end to his headline grabbing antics.It does appear that one tabloid is the mouthpiece of KP and as his best friend Piers is a regular contributor I think that we can see why this happens.
I would like him to disappear but if not then I would like him to stay in South Africa and bore them silly with tales of when he was 'The England Team' and won everything single handed!

Right I started off this morning with really good intentions and now I am onto a rant.

Back on track now.
So off to work now and I am not even going to shout at boys!!!!.

Sunday, 22 November 2015

Sunday Funday?

I wish!!! Sunday is in actual fact going to be full on busy hence  being up at stupid o'clock doing the blog.

It as a full on busy day yesterday with the church fair and also meeting  a chum from school who I haven't seen since I left 6th form ( that would be 3 years ago). We had a good old catch up and have agreed to meet up soon.

Today I have besty friend Francesca coming for lunch and then I am helping to clear my aunts house. I guess that I will be pretty tired tomorrow as I head of back to the office!.

The cricket world is still talking about Jos Buttler and I fear that he is going to become a victim of his own success. And you know that I am telling the truth.

The next  stop for the England team are a string of T20's which go on until the end of the month. And then we are into December and the boys are off to South Africa when I will be having a tough time knowing who to cheer for. After all I cannot just 'drop' Abraham Benjamin now can I?

I do know that I will be watching it all with great interest.

Now I have to scoot off to the kitchen and whip up some dhal for lunch and make another batch of xmas cake.

The last one has mysterious disappeared  ( Dame Didi).

So short one today but I will be back tomorrow without a doubt!

Saturday, 21 November 2015

Another busy weekend ahead

Well it's the weekend already and what a week it has been. The weekend does not seem as if it is going to slow down any and I am preparing now to head off to the local church for the Christmas Fair.
All go!!!!

I am also suffering from serious lack of sleep something that I, Lady Lainey do not cope well with.
Last night the temperature dropped considerably and by bed time it was freezing, at 3am it was even colder and at 5am I was so cold and tired that I was nearly tearing out my orange curls.

Now I am warming up nicely as the heating is on and I have coffee, the wind is still blowing a gale outside.

No chance of freezing cold out in The UAE, as England squared up to Pakistan in the series decider ODI.
England won the toss and elected to bat, it all looked a bit  'iffy; when Hales went on having clocked up 22 runs which left the gate open for Jason Roy to chase down his first ODI century, which has hardly caused a smudge of printers ink in any of the papers, Jos Buttler the most inconsistent England player in my opinion came in and scored 116 and the fastest OUIO century.
However if showboating was an A'level he would definitely have got an A Grade.
I love cricket more than life itself, but I did not enjoy an innings of flamboyant shots.
 Well he has his 15 minutes of fame, now he needs to prove he is what he tried to show yesterday.
I think that you have already gleaned my opinion.

Of course Twitter was alive with the 'Buttler Brigade' the same ones who will cheer on any cricketer that does well claiming that they 'always rated him'

 England won the match and the series, however there are investigations now ongoing into match fixing in the 3rd ODI.

What the flip!!!

So with very heavy eyelids I am now off to the church fair,to do my bit.

Friday, 20 November 2015

Ahhhh it's F(ryan)day

And so we are back at F(ryan)day and the weeks are slipping away very quickly, before I chuffing well know I, it will be time to get the Xmas decorations out of the garage, look at them and then put them back in the garage for another year.
Maybe this year I will feel like putting them up???? Not sure yet we will have to wait and see.

Yesterday saw the naming of The South Africa Tour Squad, oh my dog did Twitter go into meltdown, when they said that Ian Bell was not in the side, yes the oldest Bell joke in the world did the rounds.

Bell himself took to Twitter to say that he was 'gutted' and had been working hard to wards the tour. Just a shame that he hadn't worked so hard on the last few test appearances.
I do think that for a professional sportsman, it is hardly professional to 'whinge' on social media. #justsaying

And of course it was reason enough for 'HWMNBNITB' to rear his ugly head again saying that he couldn't understand why Bell was dropped. Is this ego for real!!! I suppose though he did this to get his name back  in print and help to publicise that he had a show on ITV.
Not that I would watch it.
Rather poke sticks in my eyes.

No Adil Rashid, and then rumours circulated that he is off to BBL, and possibly even Adelaide Strikers!! Well now!!!
No Liam Plunkett either but strangely Gary Balance got a recall......................... not too sure on that, hope that I eat my words.

Today England are hoping to wrap up the ODI series with a win.
I will be tuning in.
And tonight The Dame is coming over to the Chateau as tomorrow is the Church Christmas fair and we are off to do our 'thing'

Now I am off to do my other 'boss' thing.

Have a great F(ryan)day.

Thursday, 19 November 2015

Time to get back on track

yes indeedy doody, it has been a mad few weeks culminating in my Birthday which I love more than champagne itself, but it is now time to settle down and get back to the work in hand.

I am back at the gym and now that I seem to have the tennis elbow under control I cannot afford to let it slip.

So tonight after work I will be donning the sports garb and going to lift some weights, flex my biceps, get my abs back on show and all of this whilst wearing my tiara! Flipping heck, I tell you walking round with one of those on day in day out is weight training in itself.

 I am hoping that by the new year I will be feeling like a new Lady Lainey and not like the tired Lainey I am at the moment.

However as I have a few days break from cricket and no need to get up at stupid o'clock, I might be able to get a spot of R & R .

Not getting any R & R at the mo is a former fave of I, Lady Lainey, the lovely Brett Lee ( got a little thing about bowlers, always have had). Anyhooo  Brett has made a film and been snogging woman in it!!!! what the flip!!

This set me thinking about some bowlers I would like to snog but sadly we do not have enough hours in the day to put them all down on paper for you all to read, and anyway I am sure that you can guess my Top 10.

Never been a fan of wicketkeepers  ( apart from Jonny Bairstow & Jack Russell)  too flipping mouthy for their own good ( and some of them still are!), give me a bowler any day, especially a fast bowler!

Then I started thinking whether I have ever really had a crush on an opening/mid order batsman.
Well you all know I have a bit of a thing for Abraham Benjamin, and also TLJL ( who will remain an acronym) but in the past have I ever looked coyly at one from under my tiara. Answer is no.

Ohh and I also got word through that I am going on a course to learn to score!!!!

Well now that kind of ties in with above!
Although in reality it is not quite that kind of scoring, but the cricket kind.
Well I am trying to keep myself out of mischief.........................................and failing miserably!! ( or gloriously as it should be)

 best get on now and go and do the day job. Time to go to Super Swanky Lady Lainey office, shout at idiot boys, drink copious amounts of green tea and look wonderfully pretty for 7 hours.
Its a tough life

Hahahaha  our super job in the Channel Isles is being run by 'Bob the Builder', I jest you not!

Wednesday, 18 November 2015

sad news

Yesterday morning we got the very sad news that my Aunt ( and godmother) had passed away. She had been very poorly for a while and although we all knew it was for the best, it is a sad loss and making our family get smaller. She was a funny lady who always made me laugh.
I remember fun holidays with her and my Uncle  and will always cherish the memories of a strong, sometimes outspoken lady.

Go party with the rest of the family now!

And then this morning the news came through that former New Zealia rugby player Jonah Lomu had very sadly passed away. He had retired from Rugby due to a rare kidney condition however his family have said that his death was completely unexpected.
Thoughts are with them.

And also with the lovely Dave Callaghan 'Cally cricket', who is the voice of Yorkshire CCC cricket coverage. He is not too well at the moment and we all hope that he is back on his feet very soon.

And now for more cheerful news.............

....or is it, well luckily for us cricket fans it is. England were in action in Sharjah against Pakistan and due to a wonderful knock by James Taylor England managed a six wicket  win against the hosts and go 2-1 up in the series.

This is good news for this ODI team although I am still not 100% sure of the Captain!.

As Australia said goodbye to Mitchell Johnson yesterday , players took to Twitter to wish him well including my 'faves' from South Africa. A fitting tribute to a great player.
Strangely there were not a lot of England players wishing him well in retirement................which I would have thought there would be.#nemesis

Its a little bit cricket quiet today so tonight after the gym I am guessing that I had better get prepared for the Church Xmas Fair which I have agreed to take a stall at.

Not sure why I did but its all for a good cause.

ooohhhhh and Santa is there tooooooo!!!!!

Tuesday, 17 November 2015

work today!!! Yuk!!!

And so I finally have to go back to Super Swanky Lady Lainey office and  face the mess that the office boys will have made  whilst I have been away.

I needed something to brighten my day so I chose a picture of Dizzy because he is  only man I know who can make me smile/blush and laugh all at the same time.
Top bloke, top coach and funny too!

I decided to have an early night  last night,and then managed to wake myself up in time for the start of the last day of Australia and New Zealia. And hear the news that Mitch Johnson had announced that he was retiring from international cricket!!
This woke me up completely and I then listened to Australia batting and declaring at 385.

Sadly rain has now stopped play and it does look as if Mitch is not going to see his last match out on the field but watching  from the pavilion.

Woooo hang on the rain has just stopped so anything could happen!

England are in action later on today so I must remember to pack my radio to listen to what is going on and drown out the out of tune singing in the office.
Rain is still falling  in Perth so it is not looking good.

Rumours are now gathering momentum that Mitch Johnson will be playing in the BBL and the IPL. OOh wonder if he will be 'Team Strikers'????

Well time for the off and then gym from work tonight.
I am sort of getting into the hang of it! I hurt in places that I  don't really want to but hey, no pain no gain.
I know that this is going to bene fit me in the long run, just got to keep it up.

Lots to do now, so  time to go.

wish me luck as I go back to three days of 'boys let loose'

Monday, 16 November 2015

I'm back!!!

Well I was off to bed very early last night after having  had 40 winks on the sofa late afternoon.
Yes my birthday weekend had taken it's toll.

So what did I do?

Well on Saturday I welcomed besty friends Sam & Simon to The Chateau, and we set too on a massive 'gutbash', starting with homemade soup and freshly baked chilli bread,

As is the case,we did not stop talking, with so much to catch up on and before we knew it, it was time for dinner.

Now I, Lady Lainey had put 'coq au vin' in the slow cooker which was super brilliant idea and meant that we could do lots of talking and I spent very little time in the kitchen.

After a late night I was up early yesterday and cricket on straight away.
I opened my cards and pressies and we had a fabulous brunch.
 Before I knew it, it was time for my friends to go home, I settled down to chill out and relax.

As birthday weekends go its been brilliant and then there was the cricket in Australia, after my Aussie boys declared on 559, New Zealia went in and only flipping well hit 624 with Taylor hitting a record 290!!
 If you were watching that live, it will have been some  innings.
Australia are back in but have lost Khawaja, who has a hamstring injury.
They are currently 186-2.

Its all going off over there!

Now that the birthday is out of the way, it is time to settle down to cricket in the Southern hemisphere, most especially as we are just over a month away from the start of BBL in Australia, and we all know who I am backing, oh yes 'Team Strikers'

Today after the gym, I am going to crack on and 'create' things for the Christmas Fair on Saturday after which I have a couple of weekends to chill out before we head into full on Christmas mode.

Right off to organise myself to get to the gym

Sunday, 15 November 2015

Happy Birthday to me

Happy Birthday to me
Happy Birthday to me
Happy Birthay lovely me
Happy Birthday Lainey!!!

Yeah!!!! it is my birthday I am sitting drinking coffee with my  friends Sam and Simon and have a little tiny weeny headache!!!

I have opened my cards and I am preparing for us to have a mahoooosiver fry up, we are currently watching thr cricket

I promised a longer blog today but  its my birthday and I can't be bothered

so I will return tomorrow

Saturday, 14 November 2015

ou est le blog?

Where is the blog this morning, you were all shouting

And why is is so jolly late?

well it is birthday eve, I am busy tarting up the Chateau and also seeing to workmen who come bearing quotes.

You see truly rushed off my jimmy Choos

And I have made bread and coq au vin!

And now I am trying to sort out the 'barnet' ( job and a flipping half)

So this is mega short and there will be a special birthday edition tomorrow.

See you then !!!1

Friday, 13 November 2015

Its a holiday F(ryan)day

Welcome to the best F(ryan)day in the world, yes it is The F(ryan)day before my birthday and I am getting way too excited!

I spent yesterday though making my special christmas cakes. This is actually my own fruit cake recipe which suits any occasion and is wonderful. I also made some Sloe Gin and  got the crank shank sensor replaced in the Lady Lainey limo whist getting lots of cuddles from Benji the French kissing border collie at the garage. I managed to keep my mouth shut so as to avoid getting 'snogged'
As I have said before after the kisses from Benji.................I have been kissed by worse!

Yesterday was a bit low on cricket news but my Aussie boys  are in action today as I type, against New Zealia, and I can tell you it is a bit mental as Warner is on 139 not out!!!
And my boys are on  258-1.

It's going to be a full on cricket birthday weekend as not only Australia in action but also England and South Africa. OOOHHHH what more could a Lady Lainey want................................well I have a list if you would like to see it.

Today I have some visiting to do as I go to see my friend Lorraine,who regular readers will remember, broke her back in a freak watersport accident. She is on the mend two years on but still has to take it very easy.
She is going away at the beginning of Decemeber and has asked me if I will (once again) look after Zena ( warrior rottweiler) her dog.( I did this last summer).
So I am going to finalise the details.
Who would have thunk that I Lady Lainey, super glamazon, would also be the local dog sitter!!!

Rightio this is  a very short one as I have lots to do and not a lot of time to do it in!!!!

See you tomorrow when it will be birthday eve!!!

Thursday, 12 November 2015

On my holibobs !!!!!!

I am on my holibobs and I cannot tell you how flipping excited I am about that!

 No more office boys until next Tuesday, they can break wind, burp, swear, talk about football and sing off key to their hearts content!!!
I don't care!!!

Which is a bit how I felt in the opening overs of the ODI yesterday. Dear me!!!! What on earth is going on with that team. 3-14 before I had even had time to have a few slurps of my green tea!! Not a great start!!!
The ship was steadied by Captain Morgan   and Tiny Taylor,but then all the 'armchair selectors' were putting all their money on David Willey. Hmmmm you just knew how that was going to end, And after making 13 he was gone.

England were all out for 216.
 The pick of the England bowlers was Reece Topley but this was to no avail as Pakistan won by 6 wickets.
Not much else to add to that.

Andrew Strauss then chipped up that England must focus on ODI's ( non merde!) and prepare for the World Cup.
I personally think that they need to focus on cricket, you know batting and bowling, and fielding, That would be a start.

I am not going to head off on a rant as it is a glorious morning and I am on holiday.

I am however heading off to the gym, and then come back to the Chateau to get on with washing and house cleaning and all the other boring things that are involved with having guests.

I am also sorting out the making of the Christmas cakes!!!
The house is going to smell lovely.

see you tomorrow.

Wednesday, 11 November 2015

Midweek hurrah!!!

wooohoo it is Wednesday and that means it is only two days to the weekend and nearly the birthday of I, Lady Lainey. Oh my lordy, can you see my face on Sunday morning when I open the front door to this lot!!! delivering me a hugeroony bunch of white roses and a Yorkshire 2016 calendar.
Oh I must get  up extra early and sort out the birdsnest  orange curls and put some slap on.

Ohhhhhhh I am sooo super excited now, that I think I might have to have a little lie down.

OK I am fine now..............

...................well as fine as it gets here at The Chateau.

In other news ( apart from it being my birthday at the weekend), England are in ODI action today. All eyes are on their team line up as captain Morgan ( like his rum not too sure about him!) says that wicket keeper Jos Butler is fit, well physically yes but is he fit for the role???? Not in my books, I do not rate him at all.
Morgan also stated that they had no 'senior' bowlers, well I beg to differ, Liam Plunkett was in the England set up many moons ago before he hit the 'Durham Doldrums' .I would say that he has the experience and should be brought to the fore, however you just know that the 'golden child' of the moment David Willey will get all the billing.

Anyhoo good luck to them. I will be listening on't wireless in't offiice.

Then gym again, well I hurt all over so I might as well just keep the agony going.

Ohhh I have just seen that The West Indies have reinstated  coach Phil Simmons, but not before he apologised  for criticising  team selection.

OH MY GOD I cannot believe that they made him apologise. Hell in this country you can send texts to your former home country team mates during serious cricket tournaments and you get to have all your  now home team mates bowing and kissing your feet !!!!
I feel a rant coming on so best that I leave that.

Right off to the office, need to earn some pennies

and talking pennies....................

....... don't forget my Dry January challenge please donate to two very worthwhile charities. Thank you

Tuesday, 10 November 2015

Wild, wet and very windy

It has now been blowing a gale, lashing down with rain and  being utterly miserable weather for three consecutive days now. I am now fairing very well, or to put in it into lay mans terms, my flipping orange curls now resemble a birdsnest, worse than normal.
I don't comb my hair from hair wash to hair wash ever, however it is now been blown around so badly that even if I wanted to I would not get a comb through it. I can't even get my fingers through it.

I look a fright!!!!

Time to get the hats out!!!

Tomorrow sees the start of the ODI series out in The UAE, 11am ( UK time)  no team news as of yet.

In Australia the 2nd test starts on F(ryan)day in Perth.

I can see that I am going to be a tad tired on my birthday!! Which by the way is on Sunday , just in case you didn't know, in case I hadn't mentioned it. Just in case you had forgotten!!!

Oh joy I have just heard the weather forecast! it is only going to continue to rain and be windy, so tonight I think that the sauna is the order of the day after the hard workout in the gym.
I tell you the only part of my body that doesn't hurt is my elbow which has kept me awake for nearly 8 weeks.
Think this may be the way forward for me.

Right I am keeping this short as I need to get to work, not through choice I hasten to add.

Cheerio, have a good day !!!.

Monday, 9 November 2015

Monday again

Yes it is Monday again and I have now seen the back of another weekend. Yesterday was full on busy I went to see the laying of the wreaths at the church and had a little tear, then it was Homebase, Sainsburys, Morrisons and home to finish the staircase and landing, ending with the 'grand' putting up of the new curtains.

Then it was time to sit down and realise that the weekend is over and I am back in Super Swanky lady Lainey office ............................blurghhh not a pleasant thought.

However now that I have got the decorating bug again I can see that there are going to be a lot of changes in the Chateau before Xmas.
new kitchen worktops for starters!!! if I can find the ones that I want.

Great news from The Gabba, Australia put on a great show and bowled out New Zealia for 295, winning by 208 runs.
A great show of class from the antipodeans.
That made my morning I can tell you!.

Meanwhile England won a match, yes they did!! In there warm up match in the run up to their ODI's they beat Hong Kong, yes there is a match that will go down in history!!!!
If Hong Kong had won I think that there would have been some serious doubts about the England team!!!.

Hacks are now touting 'he, who must not be named in the blog' as  a 'Twenty 20 Globetrotter'. Not what I would call him.

Ode to 'The Problem Child'

I am 'he who must not be named in the blog'
For lots of money the cricket ball I will slog
Fame and fortune I hanker
Some people call me a w****r silly boy
News headlines I like to hog.

Happy Monday 

Sunday, 8 November 2015

Lest we forget

Today is Remembrance Sunday the day when we remember  and thank all the men and woman of the Military duties
I can never get through Remembrance Sunday or 11/11 without shedding some tears.
The poignancy of it all is  brought  home with the reading that they use ( see above).

No amount of poppies can ever replace loved ones lost.
All conflict needs to be a thing of the past, simplistic I know, and something that will never happen.
Today is though, about remembering brave and selfless men and women who put themselves in danger  so that we could be safe on our island.

Lest we forget 

Very good news this morning if you are an Australian cricket fan after they declared and set New Zealia ( as it is known in the Chateau) 504 to win.
Tiny Tykeroony Kane Williamson tried to make a stand for NZ but fell just before tea ( meaning he got to the table before anyone else). However rain put a stop on my Aussies boys finishing the job and NZ closed  on 142-3.

I am keeping this short as I have things to do before I head off to the Remembrance service in LadyLaineyville.


Saturday, 7 November 2015

soaked to the skin Saturday

So by the time you read this I will in the gym doing my cardio workout as devised for me by  Mr Nice Smile, it is hosing it down  outside and I have taken the (stupid) decision to walk and get more exercise.
Well at least I can go into the sauna after my work out,or maybe the steam room or as I have packed my swimming cossie I might go and have a splash for half an hour ( 40 lengths? probably 20).

UUURRGGGHHH!!!! I opened up the BBC sport site to see that  'he who must not be named in the blog' has hit another ton in the  Ram Slam T20 in South Africa. Oh yes and then I spot on Twitter all those calling for him to be back in the England team.
Well T20 is very different to Test Cricket ( ask Michael ( eye candy for the Dame) Carberry), and as he has been out fo the test game for a while I do not think that this is an option,however the lovers of the man will forever shout his name.
 In my view he is just a cricket mercenary ( not what I originally wrote , rhymes with sore). If South Africa offered him a test place he would take it like a shot regardless of his tattoo. Actually I am sure if Holland  (KP 'I once ate some Edam so I guess I qualify') offered him a place he would take it , no offence to Holland who I fully suopport  when ever they play.

I listened ( most ) of the night to the cricket from Australia and I tell you I was getting  to like Miitch Starc but now I think he might be up there with the mighty AB.
The Aussies  are making the Kiwi's sweat,and were hitting hard in their second innings which  produced two tons from Burns and Warner.
I love the new energised Australian team,and love them or hate them they really do put all their passion into the game.

I have some jobs to finish at the chateau today and once they are done I think that I will be on the way to making a breakthrough in the ongoing clear out. I know I have been talking about this for months but I have had to make some very hard decisions on things including things that came from the home of Her Serene Highness. Not that easy clearing out your life and someone elses.

New broom and all that and I intend to go into the New Year a lot lighter in a lot of ways.

And so now I am off to do stuff.

have a super Saturday.

Friday, 6 November 2015

it's F(ryan)day

Oh my aching glutes,and quads and my biceps, triceps, pecs and abs, the only thing that doesn't hurt is my poorly elbow which seems to have miraculously repaired whilst the rest of me is supposed to be getting into shape!

I was with a 'trainer' last night who probably wasn't born when I first did weights, but bless him, he had a lovely smile and was very nice to dear old me. he did say that he had fought with the other trainers to get me as I didn't want to  'tone and lose weight' my card said 'Weight lifting, definition, rock hard abs', I think that the chance of that happening is about as great as me marrying Sir Sean of Bean, but 'Mr lovely Smile' said I would be looking good in 6-8 weeks and in 21 weeks ( my aim) I will be great ( I bet he says that to all the Grannys).

He also said that despite my protest at not being able to 'plank' after my feeble 1 second attempt, that in 2 week I might be able to hold it for 5 seconds! Bless him, bet he changes his shifts now.

Changing shifts and even continents, is Mark Wood who is only flipping well coming home as his ankle injury is worse than thought. England have broken him. England are like the cousin you didn't  ever want to come to your house or worse still , play with, because they broke your toys. Yes England are the David ,Joanne, Julie and Kayanne of the sports world!

And they lost against Pakistan in tremendous fashion. There were some shocking batting displays from Bell Root, Bairstow, actually most of the team except Captain Cook, that is harsh because when you look at the scores of Moeen Ali, Adil Rashid, Broad and Stokes did at least clock up double figures.

Were is it all going wrong?  Well keeping Bell in the team with such shocking scoring is a huge mistake.

oh if only I was the King of Cricket.

Oh now I think I might just submit my CV because goodness only knows how much time Trevor Baylliss has left, and remember I asked Gillespie the Gallant the question about whether he would take the job if offered and he said no, and if he ever does I  am going to kick his bottom very hard indeedy!!!

Right way to early to be off on a rant on a F(ryan)day  morning.

Other news. I had t'wireless on all night to hear the Australian v New Zealand test ( I now consider myself to be Yorstralian as well as South Afrishire). After Warners amazing  163, it was topped by Khawaja who hit a cracking 174, my Aussie boys declared on 556-4.

Currently New Zealand are 106-3 although it is nearly the close of play the Aussies have been really going for 'the jugular'.

The ongoing trial of Chris Cairns,which is airing at lot of dirty laundry, also showed how much this man liked wedding cake, with 3 marriages in 12 years. Holy wedding vows!!! why would you put yourself through all that.
He is like the Elizabeth Taylor of cricket!!!!

OK off for my last 7 hours of work and then home to do more!
I have no gym tonight but an early morning session tomorrow.

Well no pain no gain as they say, they also say good things come to those who wait....................................WAITING!!!!!

Worth the wait my Aussie boys have just got 'Baz' NZ Captain out!!!! 3-12 in 25 minutes COYA!!!!!!

Thursday, 5 November 2015

The Glamazon is on the rise

yes I think that I am finally getting back to my  'glamazon' self. Its been weeks since I have felt like 'myself' having been dogged with the dreaded  tennis elbow, for over 7 weeks now, the constant pain has really dragged me down. So to be hit with a hideous cold ( which normally wouldn't bother me) was the final straw and I  just succumbed to feeling very sorry for myself.

However I have been having some treatment for my elbow which also includes  some weight lifting for me, to be honest the heaviest weight I usually lift is my handbag ( and that is the weight of a small child as it can trigger the seat belt sensor in a car). I want to say that I feel better....................well I feel a bit more like 'me' and tonight after my session I am off to the steam room.

A session in the steam room is what is order for some of the England team as so far this morning ( 6.20) they have lost Root,Taylor, and Bairstow!!!!
I fear that by the time I have arrived at Super swanky Lady Lainey office it will all be over.
I had the Australia v New Zealand match on through the night but only heard it really from 4.45am!!!

Oh dear quick update Patel has just gone LBW and that's 4 out in less than 30 minutes!!! I am thinking that the team have sunbathing on their minds which by the look of it will be happening sooner rather than later.

England have done a ........................well an England!.

Right, back to Australia who seem to be doing far better, where Warner put on  163 before being bowled. The score is currently 336-2

And the match that I am recording is the India v South Africa match  which I haven't even peeped at the score yet.

Flipping cricket it is like buses......................wait for one they all come along at once.
I have to say I wanted to watch the South African T20 match last night and then realised that 'he who must not be named in the blog' was playing and I couldn't bear to watch.

I am now about to pack my gym bag and head off to Super Swanky Lady Lainey office.

And I am 14 working hours away from the weekend!!! Wooooohooooooooo!!!!!!


Wednesday, 4 November 2015

It's hump day

Yes indeedy doody it is hump day in more ways than one. Firstly it is Wednesday and we are on the downward slope to the weekend.
secondly it is hump day as after two full days of fog and drizzle my orange curls have taken to rebelling and are now a frizzy mess! Now I remember why I wear hats all winter.
Thirdly it is  hump day as I am just not sure what to put on my feet for work, shoes or boots ( and put the trusty Hunters in the boot)
I feel like pulling the duvet over my ( frizzy) head and listening to the Test match instead of trying to get my self organised.

So after a slight deviation from the norm yesterday for news on my 'challenge'.

However talking cricket ( or listening to it as I currently am as I type this ) It has not been the a great opening few minutes for England as Lady Laineys little favourite, Jonny Bairstow missed a stumping and I think that he will be rather cross with himself..

Yesterday saw England do what they do best, have a little bit of collapse and then rally again..
Today they need to get Pakistan out for as few runs as possible and then go in a clean up...................easy when you write it down.

Other news that comes as no surprise to I Lady Lainey is the fickle world of international cricket. You know those cricketers who don't get selected for one country because although they think they are great, they just aren't, and then move on to another country on the grounds that their granny's cousins cat came from there? Yes well that is where we are with Boyd Rankin. Yes having once being proud to be Irish, he then became English, and now wants to be Irish again. Confused? well you probably will be before the end of his career, I can't wait for him to try to join  the West Indian team!!!

To be honest I never rated him and thought ( once again) he failed to live up to the hype.

Sad news filtered through yesterday when it was announced that Tom Graveney had passed away. His career spanned 4 decades. After retiring from cricket he went into commentating and  in later years was President of the MCC.

The Chris Cairns trial is still ongoing and  he is still denying match fixing. The sad thing about this case is that there are going to be players that you thought were squeaky clean, who turn out to be slightly spotted with dirt!

Well I am off to work and then off weight training tonight, gently though as we are trying to do some work to help me not have so many problems with my elbow.
I hope that you all have a good Wednesday and that the weather is slightly better with you than here in Lady Laineyville.


Tuesday, 3 November 2015

My Big Challenge

So  today my blog is all (well almost all) about me!!!!

I, Lady Lainey have taken the unbelievable decision to do 'Dry January'..................and yes I know that you are all thinking why am I talking about it at the beginning of November.
Well there are a few reasons,

1. Making it public means that I cannot go back on it ( you all know how partial I am to champers and Chateauneuf du Pape and Mountgay and Cockspur rum....). Yes I think that you get the idea

2. It means that by posting now and putting the details of my giving page you will have no reason not to donate, unlike in January when the main moan is 'No money until pay day due to Christmas'

3. I am supporting two amazing charities, both of which are very important to me.

So which charities am I passionate about and why?

Yorkshire Cancer Research

Do what it says on the tin, and some!!!!!.
Anyone who was at Internationals at Headingley, home matches for Yorkshire and the Scarborough Festival would have been aware  of the 'Turquoise T-shirted'  friendly folk who were dishing out suntan lotion, as well as advice and UV bands. Clever bands that changed colour with the strength of the sun.

The charity is also there to make sure that every person in Yorkshire leads a full and healthy life, whilst supporting those that are fighting cancer.
Working in partnership with research scientists and clinicians, the NHS and other charities , they aim to make life changing improvements to cancer outcomes in Yorkshire.

What other reason do I need to support such a great charity? 
For more information have a look at their website

Cricket without Boundaries

This is a fantastic charity  teaching children in Africa to play cricket and also teach adults to coach, so as to keep the momentum going.
They link the game to HIV/AIDS awareness and incorporate their message into their coaching sessions.
They are also highlighting problems affecting young girls, from early and enforced marriage to FGM ( female genital mutilation).
This is all done through volunteers who give time and a lot of effort to help to bring these messages to the children and adults, using the  wonderful game of cricket. (nutshell version)

For more information about this charity check out their website

And how much do I hope to raise??

Well I really have no idea, I just know that every penny donated will be used to further two great causes.

And what about me?

Well I may well be a grumpy Lady Lainey in January but I think that I will be a lot healthier both bodily and financially, which means that I can contribute to the charities too. it's a win/win situation.

So if you are wondering if you should have a latte and a pastry this morning, why not fore-go and just donate a little bit of that money to these wonderful charities. 
I  for one will be very grateful and will know that my upcoming abstinence is well worth it.

It also means that the men that empty my recycling bin  will not be suffering as many back problems in January!!!

If you are reading this via the Twitter link please retweet.

Thank you. 

Monday, 2 November 2015

Cold and foggy morning

it's a cold and very foggy morning here in LadyLaineyville and when I say foggy I mean 'peasouper'. It is currently 5.45am and it has been like this all night.
I am not looking forward to the drive to work.

So yesterday was busy but I can still not see what I did.
I did however listen to the cricket which was not great for Ben Stokes who during the afternoon went to take a flying catch, landed 'wrongly' and was taken off the fields with his arm in a sling made from his shirt. He is having a scan and hopefully it is not too bad news/

They managed to bowl Pakistan out for 234 
At this minute, Moeen ali has just got out and  as an opener he is not really cutting the mustard. Sir Geoff has a lot to say about this and is being very vocal.

 And now it is Bells turn. Lets see what he can do..................

Over in South Africa they started their T20 season,not something that would be on the British radar but for the fact that  'he who must not be named in the blog' has tipped up. There was far too much on twitter about this and Sky were showing it too.
As it turned out,as was posted on Twitter last night. 'KP won the game!' There you go it must be true that one man is a team especially when he is involved.
Hopefully they  will love him so much he will be offered a contract back home in SA and we will never have to hear about him again.

I can but dream.

And so now I am off for another rubbish week in Super Swanky Lady Lainey office. This week however I am feeling slightly better and so am starting the week on the right foot.

Tomorrow I am  going to reveal my little challenge in which I hope you will all help me.

Until then.

Sunday, 1 November 2015

All Saints Day

It;s All Saints Day and it's the beginning of November, the best month of the year as it is the month of my birthday, in fact it is two weeks to my birthday and I am super bouncy excited all ready!! Woohooo I loves me birthday.

Today is also the day that Rob from Flicx Pitch may be waking up with a headache, after going 'Sober for October'.
This is the man who likes to have a pint or two especially with his work colleagues.
Well done Rob, you have spurred me into be continued.

However today is a cricket day and  as I am typing I am lying in 'mon lit' listening to the cricket coverage. I could go and watch it on TV but I am revelling in lounging around in bed for a few more minutes.
Pakistan won the toss and elected to bat.
England elected to field three spin bowlers which has caused a bit of a stir.
 Anderson and Moeen took the early wickets of Ali and Hafeez.

They are now having a spot of lunch and Pakistan are currently 87-2.

Yesterday was quite busy here in the chateau, washing, painting and making things. Obviously the house is in chaos and I need to get it  into some sort of order. I am listening to the whir of the dishwasher and I will be getting more washing on shortly, however getting it dried is the problem.

I also need to make a start with the Horse chestnut leaves which are now forming a beautiful carpet outside my house but due to it also being wet, are filling me with fear after I slip on them last year and chipped my elbow ( which is not one of my strongest body parts at the moment).

you can see that I have a lot to do today and can you guess how much will get done?
Yes you are probably right I will be giving most of the day up to cricket.

OOOOOhhhh and it is 5 months until my super besty night out ever. What night out is this????
Well you will have to wait 5 months to find out!
And we are also one month nearer to the cricket season. Now that's enough to make me get out of bed and do something constructive.

Off to do something and England seemed to have taken a wicket.......................but no it was not to be.