Back to dark morning

So it is now British Summer time, but as I sit here banging the keys on the keyboard (5.55am UK time) it is flipping pitch black outside!!,However not for long. The mornings will start to get lighter and soon the sun will be shining and it will be summer. ( more like the wind will be howling and the rain lashing down!).

So yesterday I went of to visit Tzarina Katerina and then came back to the towers to have a fight with the Boot Room blind, well it won that battle but I will win the war!!!

Then ironed and put up the other 2 pairs of curtains and also made a start on painting 'the office'. I managed to have a little nap too.

Lo and behold I  sold quite a bit of junk treasure on eBay, which should start to make an impression on the house soon..........................I hope so, as I am drowning in 'treasure'.

Well over in the WT20, Australia were not having a good time as they lost to India, who went through to  the semis as Group Two winners. Australia are out of semi final contention and so will be getting ready to pack their cases and head home with their tails between their legs. Its hotting up in the competition, my money is still on The West Indies though.

Ashley Giles ( no its not rhyming slang) has been talking about how he is not afraid to make 'important' decisions if he gets the England  job. Well to be honest if he does, the first 'important' decision that he needs to make is where to get a flipping good team from!!!!!


I do not think that he is the man for the job, I have a couple in mind but they haven't even been mentioned. And luckily for all the Tykes fans Gillespie the Gallant has said that he is not interested in the job. Well the Yorkshire team look a far superior to the England team so I am not surprised that he is staying put.

Loved reading a piece by Steve Waugh who said that England were right to get rid of KP, as he was more trouble than he was worth!!!!!. Well now then, what about Broad, Lumb...........................................

There was a bit of F1 yesterday which LH won. Baron Button finished 6th and said that his car wasn't quick enough. No matter, we know that he can do well. However this season is going to be a difficult one for him as 'Papa smurf' is not there to  cheer him on.


So another week, and  I have lots to do this week apart from going to super swanky Lady Lainey office and looking pretty for 7 hours! The battle of the blind will recommence this evening, after I have been for a walk and done circuits. Then I am sorting out more 'treasure' to either go to the charity shop or  be binned.

Its starting to look like it is going to be a long old week!!!!!

It's Summer!!!

Well it's officially British summer time, and looking out of the windows here at LT Towers II I can tell you that unless the grey swirly stuff that is out there is a heat haze ( which I doubt very much) then I suspect it is going to be a grim  and foggy old day. I have been up since really stupid o' clock (4.30am), it must be time for my nap now!!!.

So yesterday I did not stop from 8am until well after 6pm. What was I up to?? Well I went for a walk, then dropped 'stuff' at the charity shop, did the shopping, came home wallpapered the boot room, finished painting the other walls. Moved the dresser that is in there and then 'humped' two pieces of furniture up and down stairs just to see if they 'suited' the newly decorated room. Oh yes and I took down  5 pairs of curtains and put 3 new pairs up. I was too chuffing tired to iron and put the other 2 pairs up last night. Guess that's a job for today after I have been to visit Tzarina Katerina and dumped some 'stuff' on her, been to the tip, put the boot room blind up........................yes it is going to be a busy one again.


And the England cricket team will be super busy today.........packing their bags to come back to Blighty after crashing out of the WT20 in the  group stages. South Africa booked their place in the semi finals after destroying England.  I have to say that I am neither surprised or disappointed. The team are in disarray, the powers that be seem to be making a mockery of English cricket and I seriously think there needs to be some major clear out in all cases.

On the back of this loss Chris Jordan and Michael Lumb have been awarded  incremental contracts. #kissofdeath

Sadly The Netherlands are also out of the competition after being beaten by New Zealand. They may have posted the lowest T20 international score the other day, but they came back fighting  and continued to the last. Something that England need to learn.

It wasn't fairing much better in footyland yesterday either as Birmingham went down 2-4 at home to Bournemouth. And The Mighty Whites went down 1-2 to Doncaster at home.  Sadly even my beloved Blades lost as they went down 2-1 away to Swindon. What the Donald Duck is that all about??? What the chuffing heck is going on?????

Team talk to the boys. Pull your flipping socks up and get out there and win. ( this carries over to cricket too).

Well the grey swirly stuff is still floating around outside the Towers and it ain't feeling warm!.
I am about to do some more washing and hope that it brighten up later so that I can put it outside to dry.

And then I might just make a start on decorating  the 'office'.................................

Flipping pouring down!

And sadly with rain and not champagne!!! I could do with a bucket of the stuff................yes even this early in the morning.

Well the washing  is in the machine, the dishwasher is on and I am up and dressed and about to go and

1. have a long walk

2. Take lots of rubbish to the tip

3. drop a 'load of stuff' at the charity shop

4. Finish decorating the boot room.

5. come back and have  a nap as I am totally exhausted.

6. Find my 'besty' Maroon 5 CD which seems to have disappeared and will be a relief to Mr & Mrs S.O.Dog, neighbours of Dame Didi in France who must have heard that CD every hour of my last trip home to 'La Belle France'.



Well it is just over a week until the start of the domestic cricket season and the weather is shaping up well for it ( lashing down with rain!).

In the WT20's it's all kicking off!!! South African captain Faf Du Plessis is suspended from the match today against England due to a slow over rate in the match against The Netherlands. Does this give England and advantage??? Actually I think if they took half the South African team out it would not help England! #myopiniononly


The West Indies beat Australia in a thrilling match which saw Darren Sammy hit consecutive sixes to lead the champions to victory. It's amazing that Sammy managed to hit a ball as every match I have seen him play in, he is injured, unwell, left the field, come back on. #dramaqueen.

And India beat Bangladesh to reach the semi finals.

MEANWHILE in KP Land. The ego that is KP has announced that he is going to be playing in the Caribbean Premier League in July and August???? I thought that he was contracted to Surrey???? Even though he will be showing up late due to commitments in the IPL!!!!!  I bet those little Rand signs are lighting up in his eyes!!!


So move on quickly to the footy before I go off on a little rant.

Brimingham are taking on Bournemouth at home


The Mighty Whites are home to Doncaster


And The Blades are away to Swindon.


And I am away to do all my 'jobs' now. And maybe finally finish one or two of them!!!

And so it's F(ryan)day

And England managed to win a match. Alex Hale became the first England player to hit a T20 century as they beat Sri Lanka by 6 wickets. Well about time too!

The Netherlands were in fighting form and were sooooo very close to beating South Africa in a gripping match. After bowling South Africa out for 145, and after their last very low scoring match, it was great to see the team playing so well. Sadly at the final hurdle they fell and lost by 6 runs. It really was that close and I was really hoping that they would do it. 'HUP HOLLANDHUP'


Jon Lewis coach of Champions of the world Durham has been talking about the young bowlers at the club........................................well fell asleep halfway through reading it as it was a boring as his face is constantly miserable.


So it's nearly the weekend and to be honest I am now not too bothered about it. I have a million jobs to do ( as always) not enough hours to do them in ( as always) and no get up and go ( which has got up and gone).
Will the boot room get finished this weekend, well what do you think? Will the office get started, not on my Aunt Nellie!

Not even planning on having a drink tonight, just try to do some of the 'to do' list and early night.

So I will make this very short.

Have a good day

Big boss Thursday

No I have not already hit the bottle already that was last night!!!

 but Zut alors the big boss is here from the south of Blighty, he is checking that I am in fine voice and that all is going well on super big build in Brum. Hopefully he will take us out for a massive gut bash ( again) and give us all a pat on the back ( gently in my case as I am still very achy).

Tonight another circuits session begins and this one for 5 nights in a row.........................well we know how that is going to end.............super fit Lady Lainey??? I would like to think so.


So other news, Prince is going to retire, WTF!!!! His Royal Purpleness retiring from singing all Lady laineys fave song, Raspberry Beret being my favourite and getting me extra Brownie points with Monster Children Nephews as I know all the words ( that and any song by The Darkness.....now don't get me started....). Anyhooo I digress, yes Prince is retiring, however luckily pour moi, not the tiny purple songster but  Lancashires, Ashwell Prince. He will be leaving the game in all formats at the end of the 2014 season. ( still time for him to make my as yet unpublished book 'Cricketers Posteriors')

Over in the UAE yesterday the day dawned with lots and lots of rain which delayed the start and didn't set Durham off on a good footing. Virender Sehwag hit a century which was the not good for the champions of the world who lost the match. The loss was not a good start to the season for the champions BUT they did get some sunshine ( apart from yesterday) and Chris Rushworth bagged another shirt for his auction catalogue.

Well England are in action today and Ravi Bopara went on record to say that have a 'must win game'. Non merde!!!! Any game they play is a must win game! Well best to keep everything crossed for them. Won't be able to listen either as will have my head in drawings and schedules for the new build. Flipping work!!!!


Woooohooo the sun has just come out here at LT Towers II. That's a good sign and hopefully it will be shining all day. Dame Didi informed me yesterday that I will not be having much R & R at Chateau Didi, as there is spring cleaning to do!!!!! Tell you what Didi I will start in the wine cellar, non?
I dread to think what will happen if she purchases Chateau Didi Deaux I will be tres cream crackered.
I wish she would get servants and then I could recline on the terrace with a large pasits and read a book.

So time to twirl my curls  and get my shouty voice ready. Also good luck today Dame Didi, text me when you come out.I will be at home this evening so will call you after 8pm.

Oh well time to head off down the A1 to Lady Lainey workville and another day earning another penny for the new tiara fund.

Getting ready for my jolly's

Yep, it is now only a matter of three weeks until I step onto that plane and fly home to'La Belle France'. After the last couple of weeks I am more than ready for it. Working super hard and doing extra little jobs most evenings and also doing circuits have made me realise its a long time since last September's jaunt over 'La Manche'.

So last night I started to prepare for my return home. Well I got the case out from 'Narnia' (aka under the stairs). Dusted it off, took it into the spare bedroom and then found something far more interesting to do.................................get into bed and go to sleep.

Oh well it will be there tomorrow and the day after and the day after that, another job on my already bulging 'to do; list.
 OMG 10 days of complete R & R, I cannot wait.

So over in Abu Dhabi were Durham are not having R & R, the match against the MCC continues, Durham scored  257 in their second innings  with Mark Stoneman  hitting 115 and Gordon Muchall scoring 56. The MCC were standing on  48-2 at stumps.

In the T20 world cup, current champions West Indies beat Bangladesh by 73 runs in their group 2 match

Had a little peep at the footy scores........

The blinking Mighty Whites went down 4-1 at Bournmouth!

However Birmingham City won against Millwall 3-2. Had to check that Rt Hon Hooligan Robbo hadn't pulled another rabbit out of the bag and scored another goal, but no it will be another 5 years before we see that again.


The Blades were away to Crawley and won 2-0!!!!! #COYB!!!!!  Conor Coady being the top boy last night scoring both goals.


So this one today is very short,

'Why' I hear you all asking,

Well after last nights circuit session my 'derrière' hurts so much that I am having trouble sitting in the chair to write this!.

Oh well off to slouch in my chair at super swanky Lady Lainey office. My rooibos had better be on my desk when I get in or there will be BIG trouble.

Woke up thinking it was Thursday!

 

Flipping heck , I woke up this morning super excited because I thought it was Thursday and so nearly F(ryan)day and the weekend..........................and then the voice on the radio said it was only Tuesday. Quelle disappointed!!!

I also felt as if an elephant had slept on my legs and don't get me started about my abs and glutes, I am walking doubled over this morning, but hey no pain no gain! circuits are not getting any easier but I am hoping that by this time next week I will be whipping through them like a mad thing ( some say I am a mad thing to even be contemplating doing them in the first place).
This may all be too little too late but as you know I have no intention of being harpooned on the beach at St Gilles Croix de Vie and towed away.

Talking of being towed away, that sadly is what may happened to The Netherlands if they don't pull their orange socks up. Yesterday they recorded the lowest score in T20 international history ( well they got a place in the record books didn't they?) with an total of  39 all out. Only Tom Cooper hit double figures. With three matches still to play they need to be pulling some mighty Edam out of their clogs!!.

England may well beat this record who knows!

The champions of the world Durham staged a fight back in Abu Dhabi, with super polite young man Jamie Harrison bagging 5 wickets. the seamer led the fightback, Scott Borthwick taking 3 wickets and Rushworth and Arshad taking 1 a piece. MCC were all out for  282. Durham were standing on 39/1 at close of play having lost Jennings for a duck.

All to play for I think as long as the top order don't fold.

I was super busy all day yesterday.........screaming down the phone at the waste removal people. who very kindly terminated our contract in February but didn't let us know!!! After being on hold for over an hour and then being disconnected, my fiery temper went  into overdrive and I lost my cool. To say that the office boys were well behaved after I had been on the phone is an understatement. even 'Trill boy' didn't make any wise cracks.
I was also busy last night sorting through the treasure that had been sold on eBay. I will make some space in this house!!!!!. I also have a huge load of rubbish to take to the tip this weekend as well as a huge amount of 'stuff' to take to the charity shop.

It's all coming together now and I am hoping that LT Towers II will be in super order by the time it reverts to it's cricket season name in two weeks.

Dame Didi had a strange experience yesterday, after buying a laptop due to her PC kicking its legs up, its turns out that it was only 'playing' dead, as yesterday it had a new lease of life.........Hmmm do not trust machines, they are obviously being programmed to take over the world, and we all know that this is what I am planning on doing.

Oh well off to start my world coup in the office....................well you have to start somewhere.

Lady Lainey marches on

Oh yes, new week and I am marching headlong into it. Lots to be done this week including finishing the boot room and making a new cover for my traversin ( yes the Lady can sew too!).I am also hoping to make a start on the 'office' as it needs to be revamped. Also two more circuit sessions, a rest day and then five days full on!!! Yes lots to be looking forward to.

Yesterday was jolly busy but managed to catch up with cousin Ex RAF  Robbo, he is jolly well and 'taking each day as it comes'. And I am going round to his house next week........................CARNAGE!!! I just know that it will end in a serious hangover!!!!
It was a beautiful sunny day yesterday until about 12.30 when it flipping well snowed, and then got sunny again, so Mr Funky the Chauffeur came round and cut the Deer Park and the lawns to the rear of LT Towers II ( soon to revert to its cricket season name). I was up to my orange curls in paint at this point.

It all seems to be kicking off at the World T20 series as Pakistan beat Australia, by 16 runs. , yes its looking top be an interesting competition.

Stuart Broad meanwhile has been fined for his comment about the umpires after the England /New Zealand match. ( as I wrote about it yesterday I will not revisit it).He is the Captain of the team and should know when to open his mouth and when to keep it firmly shut. However as it appears that he overstepped the mark and is paying for it. Also a poor show of sportmanship in my book, trying to make excuses for a shabby team!

Champions of the world Durham were bowled out on the first day in Abu Dhabi against the MCC. Monty Panesar appeared to shine in his bowling however hopefully no Nightclubs and bouncers around  last night!.

Jennings and Borthwick both hit half centuries. The last wicket to go was that of Chris Rushworth who hit 29!Which was 28 more than the opening bat! Jamie Harrison was 16 not out.Durham go back on the attack today and I will be keeping up on Twitter as I am in super swanky Lady Lainey office.

Yorkshire won there series of T20 games over in Sri Lanka even though they lost yesterday  by four wickets. His Royal Ryanness was topping up his tan and having a bit of R & R. They start a two day game tomorrow. Bet Ryan is playing in that one!.


Well it is frosty here this morning, so I had better get a wriggle on and get myself off to shout at boys, look pretty for 7 hours and drink copious amounts of Rooibos ( yep still cutting down on the caffeine). Then home to do some work and then circuits! Wow that's my day in a nutshell.

Have a great one what ever you are doing.

Sunday lie in

OK I am running late today due to having a bit of a late night. Then fell asleep missed a call/message and woke up two hours later. Confused???? you should be in my shoes!!!!

Today is super busy here at The Towers, firstly I have to measure for the astroturf  to have the wicket laid in the extensive grounds, then I have to price up hardcore ( OK everyone get your minds out of the gutter!!!), then I have to finish painting the bootroom and hang at least some wallpaper, and then it will be nap time.

No circuits for me today so I think I might just do some pilates at home. I expected to be crippled this morning after three days of solid circuits. I hurt and ache but I am walking which is good.

I will not get harpooned on the beach, I will not get harpooned on the beach ( the new mantra).

I am hoping that Dame Didi is reading this blog on her new 'laptop' after massive probs with her PC she binned it yesterday. Hope all is going well.


So what happened with my Tykes yesterday, well they won didn't they, yes of course they did!! what else do you expect from my band of Vikings. His Royal Ryanness sat out the second match and when I saw that he wasn't playing I nearly hyperventilated!!! OMG I was tres worried. However he was just taking it easy, well he's not as young as he used to be!!!!

However England did not win their  match and were  beaten by New Zealand ( by 9 runs via D/L ) after a bit of a disastrous day on the field. Rain and thunder and lightening were unleashed on the ground, the players were taken off but not quickly enough for Stuart Broad who is now whinging to any one that will listen that they were all put in danger.

I know that the lightening was affecting the batsman, and yes they were not great conditions to play in, but man up Broad!. For the love of dogs! It was raining you got your hair wet. oh yes and  lost!

Champions of the world Durham are playing the MCC today in a far sunnier place than here, ( although the sun is shining at the moment,). They have been sunning it up, whooping it up and now have to go out and show why they are champions. Good luck to the boys.

And so as I glance out of the window across the Deer Park ( which is getting to look in need of a cut,) I think that I had better get a wriggle on and do some work.....................but first a full English I think!!!

Bon Journee

Super fit Saturday???

Well 'der boys' have been having a little game of cricket today after sunning themselves around the pool yesterday. If you look at the photo carefully you can see Gillespie the Gallant  writing his memoirs in the background!!! ( chapter 300 ' Saw some crazy orange haired 'glamazon' at Chester le St I wonder who she is? ...... ')

Brooks and Plunkett were not playing against the Sri Lankan side in the T20 match so more sunning for them!.

I was keeping up on Twitter from 4.30am this morning and His Royal Ryanness taking a wicket. Top boy!!.
And better still after a little nap I awoke to find that my Tykey Vikings had bowled well. They have to win this surely???!!

Another winning side ( and boy was this exciting) was The Netherlands.
They knocked out Ireland in a cracking match which saw the Dutch hit 19 sixes!!! Honestly all thoughts of looking pretty at my desk yesterday were out of the window as I was in a curl twirling frenzy trying to keep up with the reporting on Twitter. bad luck for Ireland but flipping well done to the Dutch. Great cricket.


More World T20 news with Luke Wright being ruled out the tournament and being replaced by Craig Kieswetter. Wright is suffering from a side strain........................hell I am suffering from front, back, both sides and leg strain after completing another circuit session last night. From all the hurty parts of my body I seriously hope this is doing me good!

Ben Stokes.......................now where do I start. Well after his little 'thumping the locker' incident,he  is now having surgery on his wrist injury. He has fractured his scaphoid bone in his wrist and is ruled out of the T20 (obviously!) and will be reviewed in 6 weeks which means that he is also close to being ruled out of the opening of the season. what a silly billy!!! not much more to add to that.


LT Towers II will be a busy place today as I am tackling the 'boot room' this afternoon. yes I will be up to my orange curls in wall paper paste and paint. However I hope that when it is done and turned around it will look flipping brilliant and that will be another job crossed off my 'to do' list.
And then there will be another circuit session, before I have a rest day tomorrow. I am also going for  super long walk and then having a nap ( well it is Saturday).

I donated my £3 to Cancer Research and uploaded my no make up selfie. In case you need something to deter children from touching the fire here it is.

Quick put some slap on!!!! Its enough to scare the 'bejesus' out of normal folk!!!!

Well off to have some poached eggs on toast for my brekkie and then busy busy!!!

Also super big birthday wishes to The Blades who are 125 today gosh 104 years older than I Lady Lainey ( in my dreams!)

have a super fit Saturday and Dame Didi I hope the computer gets well soon

Achy F(ryan)day

Zut alors!!!!! Je suis tres achy! or as they say in Blighty I flipping well hurt....all over. I decided that after three failed attempts at Shaun T 's Insanity, I would try 'Circuit Burnout' for 30 days. well I got through the session which amazed me, as I have been a bit of a lazy bones of late. however this morning as I went to leap out of bed with my usual vigour.........................I couldn't move my legs and when I tried to sit up............OMG abs in agony. Well its working that all I can say. So same again tonight.

I will not get harpooned on the beach. I will not get harpooned on the beach, I will not get harpooned on the beach......... ( its my new mantra!).

Some strange cricket news,Derbyshire have renamed their County Ground. It is well documented in this blog how much I detest the name that Durham changed the Riverside to ( Enormous Dinosaurs & Idiots Cricket ground or something of that ilk,) BUT!!! Derbyshire have changed theirs to The 3aaa County Ground!!!!!!! WTF!!!!! No mention of Derbyshire in the title!!!!. Yes a six figure sum is a huge incentive, and I know that  clubs are struggling financially but for the love of dogs!!! They seem to have sold their souls!

I am considering that if I win the lottery I will sponsor my Tykes and rename them 'Lady Lainey's 'Leven' and I can rename Headingley 'Lady Lainey Land' and shortly I will be carted off by the men in white coats!!

Over in the T20's, Bangladesh went through to the Super 10  phase even thought they lost to Hong Kong. Nepal also won their group. Ireland will attempt to take the final place today when they take on The Netherlands. They are also hopeful that Paul Striling will be fit to play after he took a knock on his elbow on Wednesday. ( very hurty!!! I know as I have broken my elbow and that was 'tres' hurty for a lot of months!!!!)

In England news James Tredwell has been awarded an increment contract. Tredwell who made his international debut four years ago is being lined up to try to help to rebuild the England team. However in my view its going to be a long hard rebuild.


So as the tournament takes off in full today, I am thinking that The West Indies could be on to a winner, or possibly South Africa. As for England, well if you expect nothing then you won't be disappointed!! Strangely though England have gone 'Dutch' with their T20 kit which is orange.....................whats all that about then???????

well enough rambling this morning it is time to head off down the A1 to super swanky Lady Lainey office and a day of curl twirling, rooibos gulping, and of course looking super pretty for 7 hours. However I have to get up from this chair first and I can tell you, its a real effort!!!!..

First day of spring

Oh yes it is officially the first day of spring and the daffodils are all flowering in the extensive grounds of LT Towers II most especially around the fences in the Deer Park. It can only get better from now on.......


.......as you know  I have been having a bit of a year this year.  And with the cricket season nearly upon me I am still trying to finish off loose ends. However I have now found the most amazing thing ever invented.......plastic skirting boards. Pull old ones off, stick new white plastic ones on. Never have to paint again. AMAZING!!!!.
I know of late I have been turning into a DIY fanatic but honestly. Never painting skirtings again, well.............and don't get me started on the  architrave too. Wow I am super excited by all this. I think that this is starting to be a DIY tips blog!!!!

So lets get back to the important things cricket, OMG! think we should go back to 'DIY corner'!!!

Well England got beaten by India in their second warm up match. This being their final warm up, I for one was hoping that they would be looking good. However although they  got off to a flying start dismissing India's opening batsman, Sharma for 5 and then Dhawan for 14 it was still not a good performance. Even Top Tyke Timmy Bresnan didn't manage to excel although with 1 wicket and 3 runs  he at least had a little go.

The word at the scuttlebutt is that England 'faded' after a flying start with the bat. So what's that all about???

Ireland continued through the tournament in their group by beating UAE. The win was by 21 runs on the D/L. This came about due to two floodlight failures and rain.

Zimbabwe also beat The Netherlands  with a last ball six hit by Vusi Sibandi, I love a last ball win!! . Both of these sides are trailing Ireland.

Durham flew out to the UAE yesterday to play the MCC,  Scott Borthwick  went on record to say that he is looking to take a more responsibility and is preparing to 'step up'. Hmmmmmmmm maybe he should have a little word with one of his team members who seems to lack maturity #myopiniononly

New signing John Hastings is looking forward to joining the team in late May early June after his spell in the IPL.


So yesterday in super swanky Lady Lainey office, Pony Paul and I had a very quiet day. Which was bliss, and I managed to have a nap, well looking pretty for 7 hours is flipping exhausting I can tell you.

Today however Trill Boy is back and no doubt it will have been a hideous day yesterday and an even worse evening in his house!!!!

Oh well time to scoot.

Dame Didi hope your neck is not too sore today, I did try to ring you last night, I will ring tonight after all the 'stuff' is sorted.

Mid week and its all go!

Wooohooooo its mid week and I have been working  super hard at LT Towers II, in preparation for the imminent arrival of the new hoover ( bagless cleaner actually). The 'office' which used to look like a junk shop now just looks like a shop, the spare bedroom which used to look like a junk shop now................................  still looks like a junk shop BUT there are thing bagged to take to the charity shop and for the rag man, so I am getting things done. This is all down to the fact that the housework fairies do not come and tidy up whilst I am at work, so unfair!!!!!

Once this is done the weekend is mine to 're do' the boot room, which had never been on my list of 'Things to do before the cricket season' but now features at the top. Once that is sorted and moved around I will be a happy bunny.


In cricket, England were once again up against the West Indies in a warm up match. Well what can I say.......................WI beat England.  Not quite sure how to follow that up apart from to say I hope that England improve....soon.

Hong Kong got knocked out of the T20's by Afghanistan, which is a shame because they looked as if they could have beaten England too!!!

Well another week another dose of KP ( sounds like some nasty disease...............and it could well be!!). He is going to Captain the Delhi Dare Devils in the IPL. At least he got to be in charge of something.


Cricket Australia have suspended bowler Daniel Worrell for defacing a wicket. How did he deface it?................well he scratched a picture into it............ I will leave the rest to your imagination. However having seen the offending 'drawing' I would say that from the dimensions it was of a man with a super high powered sports car!


So that's my daily round up, now off to super swanky Lady Lainey office to 'round up' Pony Paul, as we are the only two in the office today, due to Job the Jolly and Trill Boy going down to HQ. Ah peace and quiet and some serious napping time in my office I think!

Bliss!!!!

Tykes Tuesday

So whilst I was in my 'pit' dreaming of sunshine and cricket, my beloved Tykes were living the dream in Sri Lanka, yes there is sunshine and cricket a plenty over here, and here's me thinking that they would all be lazing around the swimming pool topping up their tans and drinking a couple of 'gin slings', how wrong I am. They are having a little interteam cricket match. Yes Pyrah XI v Ballance XI Team Ballance are currently fielding with his Royal Ryanness bowling well.

Team Pyrah are currently ( 5.55am UK time) 7-0 and need  294 to win. Come on Ryan, knock those flipping bails off.

elsewhere in cricket it was a busy old day, Durham Champions of the world ( but for how long?) signed  Australian John Hastings as their overseas player.  Hastings will be filling the hole left by Dale Benkenstein, who decided to leave and move onto 'South Durham' aka Hampshire. Durham last had an overseas player in 2012 when they signed Hershelle Gibbs solely for 20/20. And look how that ended!! So here's hoping that Hastings makes his mark with the squad.

Stuart Broad has said that he will be fully fit to play in the world T20's so that proves that frolicking around in the sea in the West Indies does you the power of good.

In the World T20's Ireland pulled off a great last ball win against Zimbabwe and on St Patricks Day none the less either.

Talking all things Irish, no doubt there will be a few thick heads this morning and none thicker than former Lord Lainey who thinks that he is Irish because he likes soda bred and potato cakes!!! However for once this is one reason to get completely 'trollied' that I give a miss. Even though I married into an Irish family I am still French through and through so 'Vive La France' and roll on Bastille Day !!!!

I was chatting to Dame Didi last night as we continue to discuss the itinerary for our 'Grand Tour' home to France. it goes something like

Stay sober on the one hour flight.
Drive for one hour to Chateau Didi,calling for supplies on the way
Get completely trollied on the terrace,
Forget to put hot water bottles in the beds
Sleep in numerous layers of clothes
Get up at 4am to see the million stars in the sky and scare the local feral cats which climb on the roof.
Wake up late, take 2 ibuprofen and start all over again!!!

Well something like that although I think the Dame has other plans for the holiday #newhousehunting.

So today I head off to super swanky Lady Lainey office which is now back in my reins. So as I fix my second besty tiara onto my head and prepare to get Lady Lainey limo out of the garage I bid you all a Terrific Tykey Tuesday .

Must remember my phone which is charging due to a marathon phone call last night. I think that I might be enjoying the Durham v Yorkshire match more that I thought!!!!

And so............................

Mr Funky the Chauffeur and Lady Lainey 

the new week begins and I am ready for it. It was a strange old week last week, which got stranger over the weekend. However all behind me now and on to this week.

And the plans? well at some point I am going to paint and wallpaper the 'Boot Room'. Yes after 'doing' it last year I have decided to 'do' it again. This time with some wallpaper too. I seem to have got the wallpaper bug. Who knows I may actually get the sitting room done this summer. ( OK don't want to put too much pressure on myself).

Jonathan Trott has been speaking about his illness which caused him to leave the Ashes tour. He has said that he was burned out because of the relentless workload, ( yep know that  feeling well!!). Following rest and sessions with a psychologist Trott is hoping to  win his place back in the England team,. I however wonder why he would put himself under that pressure again?

The World T20 openers saw Bangladesh beat Afghanistan and Nepal beat Hong Kong. Tomorrow they have a little swap around and Bangladesh play Hong Kong whilst Afghanistan play Nepal. Today Netherlands are playing UAE.
England play their first match on 22nd march, when hey take on New Zealand.

Dame Didi is thinking about adding to her French property portfolio, she really needs to stay off the internet. However this time next year she will hopefully be getting ready to go to La Belle France for good, and I can tell you if things don't improve here I will be going with her!!!!

So what does this week have in store apart from more decorating?
Well.............................(drumroll)........................I am getting a new hoover on Thursday  ( as long as it has arrived in Argos in Aycliffe). So I will be able to do some hoovering ( oh joy!). I will be working super hard for the next couple of evenings, bringing in some extra pennies. And I will be making sure that I get all the junk on ebay whilst it is still free listing!!!!.


And now I am off to super swanky Lady Lainey office to regain control, which of late has been slipping badly. So off to shout at boys, look pretty for 7 hours and drink gallons of rooibos.

Now I will start as I mean to go on.

Sunny Sunday

Well its super sunny here in Lady Laineyville although the wind is blowing ( howling), which is fine in my book as I have 'heaps' of washing to hang out on the line.
That aside, it is going to be another busy day here in The Towers as there is lots of work to do before nap time.

Also today sees the start of the World T20. Woohoo more cricket and this time a real mix of teams. From Afghanistan to Hong Kong. I am looking forward to all of it and to be honest this will set me up for the start of the season.

I have been checking out the teams and looking at the 'ones to watch' list. Well obviously Australia have Aaron Finch ( soon to be a fully fledged Tyke). New Zealand have  Corey Anderson who will also be appearing in the IPL for Mumbai Indians. ( I think I will be watching him!). South Africa have Quinton de Kock.

And then we have England and I use that term loosely as 4 of the squad are not even born in England. Dernbach and Lumb ( South Africa). Jordon (Barbados) Morgan ( Rep of Ireland). Had Stokes been fit it would have been  5 as he was born in New Zealand, Wow its like the United Nations in that dressing room.


And talking United Nations, Dame Didi has hit on the idea that instead of struggling in 'franglais' and 'United Nations Give us a clue' with Ludo the plombier, she is going to write a list of  'useful' phrases in a book for reference. Zut alors!!!!! Sacre bleu!!!!! how hard is to ask where the wine aisle is??????
I have told her to just speak French and stop worrying

And to be honest watching her and Ludo trying to suss out what is wrong with the boiler is entertainment in itself!!!!

In case you are ever in France and need to know where the wine aisle is just ask
'Ou est l'allee de vin' then fill your trolley and enjoy.


In football it wasn't a good day for my teams.

Birmingham were well and truly beaten by Sheffield Wednesday. On the up side Rt Hon Hooligan Robbo got to go to Sheffield!!!  4-1 was the score!

The Mighty Whites were away to Burnley and lost 2-1!!

The Blades didn't play.


And so as I close today  it would have been the wedding anniversary of His Royal Gorgeousness and Her Serene Highness today. And if they were here they would have been married a lot of years!!!!

Happy Sunday

Things I know about boys no33547895464

Things that I ,Lady Lainey know about boys.

1. Office boys are very horrid, say rude words in front of Lady Lainey.
2. Office boys break wind and then laugh for 20 minutes whilst scoring it out of 10
3.Boys do horrid things like make their Auntie hang over Saltburn seafront whilst they are sick because they have been drinking cider.
4 boys expect their mummies to tidy up after them.
5.Boys can have horrible tempers and do stupid things ( some of them end up divorced!!!)

So where is all this leading to ( apart from gaining an insight into my 'fountain' of knowledge about boys).

Well some boys get second chances and them blow it!

Where is this leading to???????

BEN STOKES

Yes Ben who plays for champions of the world Durham, was given a second bite of the England apple, after being sent home this time last year from the Lions tour for 'misconduct'.
 Now the silly boy has only gone and ruled himself out of the World T20 and probably quite a bit of the domestic season. How and why????
Well he was out for a duck at the last T20 match against The West Indies and promptly went into the dressing room and punched a locker! ( the locker is fine but having counselling). The result a hand injury which rumour has it is broken!!!!

What the Donald Duck is that all about!.Yes he was out for a duck ( not his first and won't be his last), however to behave in such a manner in the sport of 'gentleman'.......well that sums it up really.

I seriously thought that this second chance would bring out the best in him, and it seemed to. At Christmas he was the rising star of the England team. Today he is a silly silly boy.

He said that he 'deeply regrets his behaviour'. Closing the stable door after the horse has bolted comes to mind.

Loose cannon?

You decide.


So I the things that I know about boys is correct however I would like to say that this does not apply to all boys. Some boys are nice and tell funny stories to make you giggle.

However only SOME!!!

Joe those shirts are depreciating in value by the day!!!

Finally it is F(ryan)day

yipppeeee!!!! it is finally F(ryan)day and I for one am jolly well glad, its been an uppy downy type of week and I for sure do not want any more of those.

Which is probably what the England team are saying today. They lost the T20 series to the West Indies but did win last night.......................however not before Sammy came in to the delight of the crowd and was sooooooo close to giving them a 3-0 victory falling just short of the 6 runs needed.

Chris Jordan was the English hero even though he was in front of a home crowd in Barbados, place of his birth. Bopara not bowling too badly either, with  the batting scorecard for England reading well for a change ( OK in places maybe not #Stokesbutlermoeen) as Jordan hit 27 in his innings.

So what now for England , well they fly back to Heathrow, change planes and then fly out to Bangladesh for the World T20 series.

Ouuuccchhhh!!!! Little Joey Root was posting pictures of his fractured thumb yesterday. FRACTURED!!!!!! It's fair nearly smashed to pieces. How the flipping heck did he continue batting?
If you hadn't seen it, here it is

Heres hoping that he is on the mend soon.

My Tykes were posting pictures on Twitter of there fantastic accommodation in Sri Lanka, no doubt they will be hard at it today..........................lounging around the pool.


So as the weekend is looming large what plans for I Lady Lainey. Well I am going to do a bit of measuring for new skirting boards ( oh joy!! can my life get any more exciting!!). Doing housework and washing and hoping that the weather stays fine so that I can have it all hung out on the line to dry!.

I also need to measure up to get the 'grass' for my wicket for my little cricketers!! ( photos will follow on from this).

I also need 4 cricket balls which I am going to investigate over the weekend. Why??????? Photos will follow for that too!!!!.


Well I have lots to do and only two days to do it in, so I had best be off now!!!


Have a fabby F(ryan)day.

Normal service resumed

yes I am back to my normal (?) bouncy tiara wearing self today after wallowing in my own self pity yesterday. If I hadn't opened the kitchen blinds to a full array of spring flowers yesterday which were planted by her Serene Highness, I think I might have been ok. However the flowers are there and no matter how hard I try to remove them they come back every year three fold! I think it is a message!

So as I settle back into normal life at LT Towers II, I have begun to wonder what I can do with the garden to make it 'mine'. Well firstly I am going to have the 'wicket' laid for my tiny cricketers and then I will at some point have decking put down to make the area were the frogs live more 'human' friendly. Yes indeedy the frogs are still there and no doubt they will soon be spawning in the puddles that are in that area of the garden. 'Oh joy' more flipping hoppy things to contend with this year!

Yes summer will see me trapped in the confines of the kitchen whilst the hideous little things hop carefreely around MY garden.

Just as I have 'let go' of the things that are causing me grief, I think that it is about time that everyone let the KP thing go. Yes Ashley Giles has now come forward to say that it was correct to sack KP. Obviously he is storing up Brownie points for his possible future role. He did say that until the balance in the team is right this question would keep cropping up. LET IT GO NOW!!

The IPL has been switched to the UAE and Bangladesh to stop it clashing with the Indian Elections. Flipping heck how hard is it to go and put a tick in a box. Do you see Wimbledon, The Test Match or any other sporting event in this country being changed because of elections. The games will return to India once the polling is concluded. There must be lots and lots of dosh in the IPL to move so many teams around!

Poor old Worcestershire have had to move all pre season games due to flooding at New Road. The ground which was under water after the rain of last month will not be ready for the pre season matches

Well in the footy last night

Birmingham drew 3-3 with Burnley and Rt Hon Hooligan Robbo got a yellow card!!!!!! He will be on the naughty step for that!

However The Blades won!!!! 1-0!!!! #COYB!!!!


So today ass I sit here spinning on my chair ( ok I have stopped now, no one likes to clean up masticated weetabix at 7am!), I am feeling a bit more bouncy and more like Lady Lainey. I also managed to do some work in The Towers last night which is pretty good in my book.

Onward and upward!!!!

Have a great day and thank you to my  knight in shining armour who stepped into the breach and offered me a seat at the Q & A with Harmy and Siddy. Hahahahah I will be in touching distance of the 'man mountain' however all I will be doing is sitting demurely in my chair!!!!  Honestly Mr Funky thats all I will be doing apart from hyperventilating!

Would you 'Adam and Eve' it

Well would you? Just when things were running smoothly in the life of I, Lady Lainey  the bombshell happens.

1.  The Blades are playing their FA cup semi at Wembley at 4pm on Sunday 12th April, which means that I, Lady Lainey cannot attend!!! This is down to the fact that I cannot get to Wembley and home to be at work on Monday without being more grumpy than I am today! WTF!!!!
I could take a days holiday on the Monday but as I am off on mon vacances on the Thursday, going home to la Belle France, it is not really an option as the 'boys' will need lots of sorting out before I leave.


2. Mr Funky the chauffeur is off to see some footy 'playoffs', not too bad I hear you cry, but on Saturday May 3rd. The day when I would have been within touching distance of His Royal Ryanness at his Q & A evening with Steve Harmison. Now I am as brave as the next Lady but will not venture to an 'event' on my own so I will be at LT Towers II that evening packing up lunch and tea for the following day.


3. England lost ( again) to the West Indies. WTF!!!! This sealed the series for the 'Windies' and made England look terrible again. high spot being that Timmy Bresnan took 2 wickets and a catch. There were no highlights in the batting of England. They were totally outplayed by their opponents.


4. My plans to make a fresh start were put on hold again and I am beginning to think that maybe I should just be happy with my lot and get on with it! It's not a bad lot actually just that some days seem worse than others.


In case you think that I am wallowing in self pity................................I chuffing well am!!!

Today my beloved Tykes take off to Sri Lanka on their pre season jolly. Hope that they come back ready to thrash the life out of all the team and take the championship title. There I said it!!! Now we know it will be kiss of death for them!!!!

So tonight Sheffield United take on Carlisle and lets hope that they manage to put a smile on the face of I, Lady Lainey, because I tell you the frown lines are bedding in nicely.

Birmingham are playing Burnley tonight too so I am hoping that they win and that Rt Hon Hooligan Robbo doesn't do anything untoward.

Wow this is a bit of a boring, down in the mouth blog today so lets look forward to the cricket season which is less than 3 weeks away, now that's something to make me smile!


We have frost again this morning due to having wall to wall sunshine yesterday and no cloud cover. It is expected to be sunny again today ( yeah!!) and for those of you who are not at work, get yourselves down to the beach for a bracing walk and paddling. If I wasn't stuck in the office with the '3 stooges' I would be there myself!

Bon journeee.

And so it continues........

.............After deciding that it was a new start to a new week, yesterday, I got off to a flying start and ended my day on a positive note. After working my (rather large) backside off when I finished work at super swanky lady lainey office. I crawled into bed at 7.30pm and feel into a really deep sleep.

Today it is is full on and I am raring to go.

Which sadly is something that Joe root cannot say, as he has now been ruled out of the world T20 series. his broken thumb is worse than was first thought. root who has turned back into 'wonder batsman' after a slow winter, fractured his thumb and was flown home. he was struck after the third ball of his innings but went onto score 107. A real trooper in my book. He has however been replaced in the squad by Bell, who in the absence of Broad will think that he is captain and take charge of all matters verbal.

No timescale has been put on Root's return to cricket  and Yorkshire start there county championship season on April 13th.

Yorkshire are however flying off to Sri Lanka tomorrow on their pre season 'jolly' which gives them time to top up their tans and do a bit of bonding. Oh yes and play some cricket.

Good news for the Channel Islands as  Jersey  beat the Caymen Islands to secure  promotion to World League  Four.This is the highest level that Jersey have ever competed. So good luck to them.

After the football excitement of Sunday with the Blades making it to the semi's at Wembley it looks like I,Lady Lainey might be joining them. My company have tickets for 'Club Wembley' and as it is doubtful that they will be using them for that day or giving them out as a 'sweetener' I may very well be going to see the boys play. Wooohoooo now that is something to look forward too. HOWEVER I have to wait until next week to find out.


I also started to get things ready for my holidays as it's not long now. So I am starting to sort out clothes and hope that I can be organised before the morning that I am flying #doubtit

This morning is cold and frosty, due to very clear skies last night and very severe temperature drop last night. Yesterday was a lovely warm day and everyone seemed to be smiling. The sun has a strange effect on people!!!

So until tomorrow I had best get on with things.

New week, new start

New week, new start. Yes I know that I say this every week, but this time its serious. Something has got to change!!! I have wasted another weekend and have very few left before the start of the cricket season. So this week apart from working flipping hard all day I will be working flipping hard in the evening when I get home.

THINGS HAVE TO CHANGE.


Well things changed for The Blades yesterday as they beat Charlton to make it to the semi's of the FA cup. OMG even though I had the hangover from hell yesterday I was flipping cheering my head off! Ryan Flynn and  John Brayford, scored within minutes of each other to the delight of Bramall Lane and LT Towers II.

There were some yellow cards dished out but at the end of the day The Blades were victorious. #COYB

Super excited except for the fact that they will play Hull who knocked Sunderland out yesterday with a 3-0 win!!!

  And then there was cricket................... oh yes!

T20 against The  West Indies who took to the crease and scored 170-3. They looked confident now that Chris Gayle was back. he put on 43 before being bowled by Tredwell.

England in reply did what they do best they collapsed like a house of cards!!!  The only high scores were Bopara and BRESNAN, yes Timmy was top scorer with 47. But this didn't stop the rot as two run outs followed and  England made 143.

And then as I have always known  it would be, Broad is crocked and will take part in any further T20 matches. Well honestly he has held up longer than I thought he would. We are now in March and I thought he would be on the bench in December.

He is resting up ahead of the ICC T20. Were England are hoping to play some proper cricket. And possibly even win a match. Although that may not happen so I do not suggest that you hold your breath.


So now as I sign off, I love the fact that the mornings are lighter, and although I have been awake since 2am ( too many things on my mind) I know that  I can have a little snooze as soon as I have gulped down my cup of Rooibos, yes I am considerably lowering my caffeine intake, and its Green and Redbush tea for me now.

See I told you things were going to change.

OH DEAR!!!!!

Oh deary deary me!!!. The cold is no better and that has  been helped in no way by the fact that last night after having a shower, and dinner I decided to go to Aycliffe Cricket club to see if I could meet the bowler that 'I have 'bought'.

Firstly its a good job that I he wasn't in.

secondly it's a bad idea to go out with Mr funky the chauffeur when you are brain fuddled with cold

thirdly any hope of 'jobs' being done today are out the window!!

Well luckily I didn't 'meet' the bowler or I might have but I don't remember.

Tim'll fix it was in  the club and came and sat with us and then Countess Christine of McNally came to collect him on her way home from work. By that point, things were going a bit 'wavy' with my vision and I think that Mr Funky had to give me a 'piggy back' home.

Shocking behaviour from a Lady!!!!

However best to do it mow before the cricket season starts.


Well in the England cricket 'Assistant' coach Paul Colleywobble Collingwood says that the team   must focus on victory in the T20 series not preparation for the ICC world T20. He thinks that confidence is the key ( and he has heaps of that). I personally think that England need a bit of time to 'gel' together and to regroup from the catastrophic events of the winter.
Yes they have a lot of work ahead of them, but they also need to try to rebuild a TEAM.

I think I know which job Collingwood is after!!!!! MINE!!!!


All saidand done. The England  team are now without Joey Root and probably going to call on Bell!!. He will be doing all the talking if he is 'in' and Collingwood will not get a chance to comment. #clashofthegingers


So its all on for  this evening with the first T20 taking place


Its all 'kicking' off at midday today when Sheffield United take on Charleton in the FA cup.

#COYB!!!

They HAVE to win ( which is now kiss of death)


Flipping heck the announced sunshine is here today, and I am going straight back to bed when I  have finished this! I am however putting the bedding in the washing machine and hoping that when I wake up (feeling better) I will get it out on the washing line and dried before bedtime!

This is super short, but I feel like I have been hit by a truck and am going back to bed!!!



Serves me right!!!

Smiley Saturday

Well it's Saturday and I am super smiley today, even though I have a stinking cold and the fact that the predicted sunshine has yet to arrive.

I am smiley because it is closer to the cricket season, closer to all that entails,..........................frostbite, wearing 300 layers and looking like the Michelin man ( I can do a good impression of that without 300 layers  of clothing on!!). eating cake and drinking coffee on the boundary and cheering on Durham ( except when they play my beloved Yorkshire). And of course blending into the background so that I am never recognised!!!

Joe Roots thumb now has a life of its own, it is taking up more media space than David Beckham's metatarsal!!! And rightly so too, he is way more important than a footballer!!!

Talking cricket, I got all the 'goss' from Loughborough last night, well the 'goss' seems to have centred on moi!!!! My orange curls and their likeness to his Royal Ryanness seem to have been mentioned a lot. I am sure though that the cricket boys talked about a lot more important things than I, Lady Lainey....................hold on a mo, what could be more important that me!!!! Hell I write a blog about me ( and some cricket and football) every day!!!


Cricket boys!!! Yes Darren Gough is still wasting space in the news with the 'is  he or isn't he' seeing  a 23 year old! I personally do not watch 'reality tv' in any shape or form and so have no idea who the silicone enhanced girl is. But I guess if Goughy likes her....................


So today is super washing and housework, and 'finishing' off day. I intend to get everything done before 'nap time' this afternoon and then tomorrow I am going to 'hit' the spare bedroom and the 'office which will be getting ready to be decorated. ( sometime in the next 4 weeks).

I have no plans for the next few weekends so I will be getting the office sorted and cleared and revamped and then I can settle down for the season.

Dame Didi has been busy working on 'deuxieme Vie' our French operation! I have not had time to sort things out recently. Thank you Didi.

And so now it is time to wash the curls and head off down to Lady laineyville  town centre, where I will do the lunch shopping for the 'boy' ( only Job the Jolly as Pony Paul has 'manarexia').

Then back to the Towers and hard graft.

hope you all have a smiley Saturday and that your nose is not running like mine. ( lovely mental picture to leave you with!!)

F(ryan)day again it comes round quickly

This is what we don't want to see this season, His Royal Ryanness being the 'water boy'! Here's hoping that he has an injury free season and gets those wickets!!! #700

Bad news from the England camp is that little Joey Root is en route home with a broken thumb!!! Flipping heck painful or what!! I once had a broken finger ( amongst other things), but I can tell you that the other person was a lot worse off, that would be when I walked out with my suitcase!!! Ah yes the past life of I, Lady Lainey. However it is the future that we are all looking to now.

Joe broke his thumb in the ODI but still went on to score 107, which is a top knock in my book.
To say that his thumb is getting a lot of press is an understatement. Twitter was fair on fire last night with all the reporting on it!!!!

Good cricket news is that Jonathan Trott has been confirmed as making a start at the beginning of the season for Warwickshire. Trott who returned home mid tour with a stress related illness, is looking forward to the new season and I for one hope that it is a good one for him.

Chris Gayle has  been confirmed as returning to the West Indies squad for the T20's now that should make things interesting!.

Flipping sad news from the 'charity camp' the big footy night that was to be in 5 weeks looks to be cancelled. However I have got my thinking cap on  ( and its flattening my curls) to try to come up with something  to 'fill the gap'.

I have been looking at the cricket fixtures and think that I might have a little trek to Leeds in July to watch Durham take on Yorkshire, its still very up in the air, but I am seriously considering having a little holiday in the 'homeland'. Well it is my big birthday year so why not live it up.

I remembered to switch my phone off last night, so that I wouldn't get woken up by any possible messages, luckily there weren't any so it looks as if my beauty sleep will no longer be disturbed.


Now I haven't talked much lately Hurley/Warne, on/off romance. First it was off, then it was back on, then it was off, then he was moving back in, then he moved on to the bra lady, then Liz was seen out on the town with Hugh Grant. Who is fathered children by two woman ( both having babies within a couple of months of each other!!). What a 'love triangle this is!!

However now we have another cricketer who appears ( and I said appears!) to be up to no good. yes good old 'Yorkshire boy' Darren Trough Gough seems to be having a mid life crisis as it appears that he is chasing a 20 something!!! OMG, get a grip Goughie!!! She is young enough to be your daughter!!

What is going on, and what on earth are those cricket boys on! ( blue tablets?????).

Well enough gossip, time to set off to do some 'work'. Yes 'cos that is really going to happen!!!!!

Happy F(ryan)day

One step forward...............

Well after a hard day in the office yesterday ( yes shouting at boys, drinking copious amounts of coffee, twirling your curls and looking pretty for 7 hours IS hard work!!). I came home, realised that the 'housework fairies' had still not been and decided that after dinner I would go to bed with 'Clive Cussler' and listen to TMS. So after donning my Yorkshire shirt (which led to cries of ' you sleep in what?' in the office when I divulged this nugget of information), I snuggled up with my hot water bottle........and fell asleep.

Now midnight really is the 'witching hour' because sure as 'eggs is eggs' my flipping phone 'beeped'. I groggily sat up read the messages. Talk about being asleep to awake in 0.5 seconds!!!! Who was it? Well sometimes a Lady keeps things secret even in her blog.

So then I had to trawl through all the twitter 'stuff' to find out what had happened in the ODI ( as I had been snoring through it all)
Well  I think that the Yorkshire shirt did the trick as Top Tykes little Joey Root and Timmy Bresnan showed why we all love being 'Yorkshire'. ( OK Daddy R some of us love being Durham!).

Joe scored his first (of many) ODI century. Whilst Tim scored 1 BUT took 3-45. Top boys!!!
Oh yes and England won the match and the series, however not to take anything away from them, if they couldn't beat the Windies at the moment......................

Australia continued on their winning streak seeing off South Africa, and seeing Graeme Smiths retirement  end in a loss. The game was not without 'excitement' of a heated kind. However handshakes and gentlemanliness was seen at the end of a thrilling match.


Gordon Muchall of champions Durham was talking about the size of the Durham squad which is now smaller than the size of the coaching team!#myopiniononly. he is hoping that he will have a regular place in the team this season. Well to be honest if the team gets any smaller they will be dragging Mr Funky the Chauffeur and I off the boundary to field!

The posters were unveiled yesterday for the 'Big' evening before the Durham v Yorkshire match. Steve Harmison and His Royal Ryanness will be having a little chat with 'peeps who turn out to support Chris Rushworths  year long 'dry' challenge. To be honest I think I have been drinking his share lately!

Which brings me to the 'Mini egg' marathon yesterday. All was looking good  on the diet front until I consumed my body weight in  mini eggs, and then felt sick until lunchtime.....................when I 'hit' Greggs.OH DEAR, its not going well and I can hear Greenpeace starting the engines of 'Rainbow Warrior' ready to haul the  'whale' back into the sea from the beach at St Gilles Croix de Vie!!!! Well at least the whale will be wearing a pretty bikini!!!!! (weather pernitting!).

So the countdown is on for weight loss and more importantly cricket!

To say that I am excited is an understatement.

Bon Journee

Lady Lainey steps up a gear

So its another thick frost this morning, but apart from it being flipping freezing it is now even closer to the cricket season. Just a month!!!!! OMG!!! I can feel the frostbite already!!!

I Lady Lainey am now stepping up a gear and making things ready for the a BIG summer.( I use the term 'summer' loosely but we can all hope as for the BIG, if my diet doesn't work it could be MASSIVE!!!). My thermals are ready and I think that I may be 'all stations go' for the big day. Super flipping excited!

A funny thing happened just after midnight ( no I didn't turn back into Cinderella............hadn't been to the ball!!). my phone 'beeped' and it was text from @garasT20, and he was with..................Gillespie the Gallant!!!  ( @garasT20 was doing some coaching/training/teaching stuff in Loughborough).
Well long story short, the fact that I think that I blend into the background of any cricket ground that I go to and NEVER draw attention to myself ( apart from when I have wobbly legs due to too much wine!) is not true!!! Nope!, not true at all. Gillespie the Gallant knew who I was,  that I  look like his Royal Ryanness ( obviously I am prettier!), I go to Durham but am a Yorkshire supporter!! however this begs the question how did I get brought up in the conversation to start with. ( flipping texting Mark as I type. #multitasking).


News from the cricket world is that all professional cricketers in England and Wales have been 'hair' tested for drugs. I personally think that this is a good thing. I am not saying that drugs are rife in cricket, however following on from the death of Tom Maynard, it can only be something that becomes the 'norm'.

Well what do you think? Graeme Swann is only backing Ashley Giles for the 'big' job.  Well in my opinion ( and it counts!) I think that he is not the man, and should not be considered. As Gillespie the Gallant has already  ruled himself out of the job, and stated that he is Yorkshire and proud and staying, I am not sure who should have the job................oh well send off my CV.....................

Derbyshire have announced that the lovely AJ Harris will take up a new role this season as Academy Director. AJ the former fast bowler has been coaching within the club, lately as the 2nd XI coach. He is a jolly nice and polite man who I had the pleasure of meeting at Marton CC a couple of seasons ago,. much more polite than the coach of the home team!!!!! #mrblinkinggrumpy

My wonderful cousin Rt Hon Hooligan Robbo has very kindly sent me a signed Birmingham Shirt. well not me personally but to be auctioned for charity.  ( me wearing a football shirt I DON'T think!!). What a little star he is. Top boy even though he is a hooligan.

And so I am off to do what I do best.....yes shout at boys, drink gallons of coffee and look tres pretty for 7 hours. Then I am coming home to do some chuffing housework, because the flipping fairies have not been to do it!!!


Hope that you all have a great Wednesday and 'C'mon Yorkshire'!!!!!!!

Too tired Tuesday

Yes I am up and ready for my day in super swanky Lady Lainey office but I hardly think that I am fit for it. After 7 hours disturbed sleep ( lots of noise next door!), I am still shattered!.

Anyhoo enough already with the moaning. Its Tuesday and its not raining so its something to be happy about!.

Sooooo what has been happening in the world of cricket. Well Andy Flower has got a new job,  he is now the technical director of elite coaching at the ECB. He sees it as a great opportunity as  he starts a new phase of his career. Hmmmmm sweetener????

Graeme Smith the South African captain has announced that he will retire from all international cricket after the third test against Australia.
He is doing this as he has a young family and to be honest they will be at University before he sees them again if he doesn't do something. Sad as Smith is a great player in my book.

And talking about  the Third test Australia were dominating the third day of the final test which is the 'decider'. However still time for SA to pull back.........or is there.


The third ODI starts tomorrow and this also is the decider, its one a piece and I for one am putting my money on The West Indies. Sorry but I think England will go out after one win thinking that they 'own' it and then collapse. My thoughts only.

We are now just over a month before the start of the Durham matches and also  two months before the Durham v Yorkshire match. Not long  and to say that I am super excited is an understatement. I have got everything crossed that the weather is decent! DO NOT want any rain!!!!!


So today is once again short and sweet as I have lots to do before I head off up the road to Lady Laineyworkville, especially as there is a layer of thick frost on the ground which I have just seen as I opened the blinds!!! Looks like I will be 'tiptoeing' out of the front door in my 'heels'.

back to reality!

So after the most eventful and fun packed weekend I am this morning sitting back at the computer and contemplating the week ahead in super swanky Lady Lainey office. Get me another train ticket QUICK!!!!!


Yes the weekend was so great and I had such a brilliant time that I can't wait to go back. Yesterday morning was truly the morning after the night before. We all looked a little worse for out 'mad' night down the Manor'. We set off to go have breakfast at the local 'Cafe'. No parking in the high street so we parked out in one of the many side roads. We got out of the car to go and have a massive 'gut bash', and there he was....................the man who took Geoff Boycotts wicket on his debut ( his 5th ball). Yes standing looking straight at me was Martin Jean-Jacques best ex Hants bowler friend!!! Of all the roads in all the Manor we were parked in the same one!!!
He couldn't come and stuff large amounts of fried brekkie down his gullet, but we ended up standing talking for about 20 minutes.

Topped the weekend off nicely.

So I started to wend my weary way back to  Kings Cross to get on the train to come home. Oh yes true to form, the train was delayed for an hour and  I was flipping sick!! However once on the train I was kept thoroughly entertained by a gentleman from Washington and before I knew it, I was back in LT Towers II with a pile of washing and sooo tired that I just went to bed.

And yes the washing fairies did not come and do it whilst I was getting my beauty sleep either!! Its all still there.


Before I go I will say that England beat the West Indies, but it was a great show of bowling and a poor show of batting on their part.
Series is level and  I am guessing that the 'Windies' will regroup and win the last game. #myprediction.

So now it is back to the normal day to day and I am now on countdown to my next 'jolly' which is in April when I head home to La Belle France and all the madness that will entail.

Short today but no doubt I will bounce back tomorrow.

For those of you who also had a journey yesterday I hope that you  are fully recovered today .

Going back North today!

Boo hoo hoo after a truly wonderful weekend today I am getting back onto the train and heading back north!!!

But before then we are all heading back into Ruislip for breakfast.

Yesterday saw us going over the road to the 'in laws' for brekkie so got ready.
John the bro in law was working on Nanny Vals new burgler alarm. The same one he fitted  at Zemina and Garys two weeks ago.

So we were all tucking in to bacon eggs the full works when an alarm went off. It was Zeminas! Gary rushed over checked the house, disarmed then reset the alarm, came back and continued eating. John the bro in law  was by this time finished with nanny Vals alarm.
We went back over to Zemina and Garys and then both house alarms went off!! Getting strange now.

I went into the bathroom put the light on and the alarm went off again!!!!!
This continued in both houses for the next hour.

Zemina and I headed up to Westgate
to go shopping and have a champagne lunch. Gary was going to footy. However by the time we got off the tube to phone messages that both house alarms were going mad and Gary and John had to disconnect them and call the makers. Apparently they were in learning mode? They were picking up each others frequency? And basically they were p*****g off the neighbours too!!!!

So shopping and champers done we came back home to find Gary cheesed off because Fulham lost. The alarms still doing strange things and the decision was made to head 'up the Manor' for an Indian.

The next four hours were a blur. If you got a smiley face text from me last night sorry  I woke up this morning with Tommy and Tuppence the cats on the bed and a dead mouse!!!!! Maybe I am ready to head back north after all!!.

I'm in former home of London!!!!

yes indeedy I am, and this is actually where I lived for 12 years of that time!!!

So after a tortuous train journey to London, I made it to Gary and Zeminas and was greeted by the sight of a bath!! Oh joy, a bath!! and a spa bath at that!!! I may not want to come home.
Then it was down to the cricket. Which was not Englands finest moment. Lumb hit his first century only to go at 106. Stokes was in and out without making any impack. Joe Root tried but ciuldnt hold out. And then there was Ravi Bopara.not quite sure what to say about him. Played a lot of international matches and never seemingly made an impact.

The West Indies are not a great team but still managed to beat England. First ODI down two more to go.

So today we are having breakfast across the road at Garys mums house. Then Zemina and I are going shopping. Yes proper shopping!!! And then tonight big family gathering at the local Indian.

And in an hour I am going to watch some cricket too.......

Sorry if there are obvious spelling mistakes But I am trying to do this on my phone.

Have a super Saturday


Breaking news!!!!! Yorkshire has released Iain Wardlaw. Something to do with playing cricket in a skirt!!!!!
:-)

Good luck Wardy