Oh yes I have indeed been busy, I have been putting quill to parchment and scribbling away at my 'Top Secret' project.
I now have 'permission' to go ahead with it and have decided that I will announce the whole thing on my birthday ( November 15th in case you have forgotten). I am super flipping excited and know that I will also benefit enormously from it
What is it?????I hear you all cry.
Well I am just being a tease now and cannot tell. Sorry.
What I don't want to tell is the score from the UAE yesterday.....................firstly though I have to say that although I did predict that Steven Finn would be crocked I did not for one moment imagine that my ramblings would come true.
Finn is now to take no further part in the Pakistan tour as he as a stress fracture to his foot.
He is destined to always be the bridesmaid I fear!
Anyhooo back to the game.
Pakistan resumed their innings and Shoab Malik hitting a double century. They declared on 523-8.
England in reply closed over night on 56 without loss.
I am not going to say anything about the bowling as I think that lots of people voiced their feelings on Twitter.
I think that England need to up their game.
END.
Oh joy 'he who must not be named in the blog' has been making his biltong hole go again. He is looking forward to a possible coaching role with England. Hell, so I am!!!! infact I think that I could do a better job then him.
KP's prematch talk.
KP. Well boys it playtime and as you all know I am the greatest player in the world and I know how to win matches. I can bowl too and I am a pretty outstanding fielder too. I know that when I speak everyone listens and I know the my best mate Piers also Tweets everything that I say just to make sure it gets to every form of low life too.
So today I want you to go out into the field and think that you are me. Go out and know that you are a winner and know that everyone loves, respects and wants to be you. Go out and win the game for you, not for England,after all if you are me you are South African.
England team. ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Lady Lainey team talk
LL. OK boys, you are great players or you wouldn't be sitting in this dressing room, you need to focus on what you want to achieve out there today. You need to think about how you are going to achieve this and then go out and put that into action.
In the words of my favourite Bond Villain ( and a canny Yorkshireman to boot) 'For England James!
Now for flipping hecks sake go and win and stop giving that blinking South African something to talk about in the papers.
Oh and can all the Yorkshire boys each get a century including you Liam Plunkett.
England Boys Rightio your Ladyship, we'll go and do our chuffing best and make you jolly well proud of us. Tally ho!!!!
See I think I could be halfway good at this coaching lark.
Sit in the sunshine watch cricket drink copious amounts of coffee, eat cake go into dressing room shout at boys and look pretty too, not far removed from what I do now, except its cricket !
However in the real world I am now off to Super Swanky Lady Lainey office to shout at boys drink copious amounts of hideous vomit inducing 'Gold Blend'coffee and look very pretty for 7 hours.
Well someone has to.
Until tomorrow!!
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