Well as the cricket season is now well and truly over I decided to have a look back on how it was for I, Lady Lainey.
It started for me in February when I decided to no longer be the most glamorous tea lady on the circuit. I know that my ‘baps’ were the talk of the League (and further a field!!!!). The love of cricket over the love of making cheese and pickle sarnies at 6.30am on Saturday and Sunday mornings meant that I would get to see my beloved team ………………well who is it to be!!!
As regular readers will know, I was born in Yorkshire and raised in Co Durham so although a very long standing Durham member, I still support my Tykes and have to sit on the fence when they play each other( sometimes I am more to one side of the fence than the other! #coyt)
March saw the Tykes out in Barbados, topping up their tans and having a little game of cricket.
Then it was back to Blighty ready for the start of the season.
That was when ‘Knickergate’ happened; yes the shock on the face of I Lady Lainey at the sight of his Royal Ryanness on the opening page of the Yorkshire website……….. in the dressing room………… in his purple undies. #screensavernow
And that was just the start of the season, how could it get any better??????!!!
Well, I won a 150th Anniversary Yorkshire shirt so was super jolly excited by that, but thought it best not to wear it around April 24-26 when…………………..
…………..I Lady Lainey had taken 3 days holiday from work ( every flipping day is a holiday for you- Job the Jolly) to go and see Durham v Yorkshire at The Riverside ( OK, OK Emirates Durham ICG!). It was chuffing cold and I was feeling a little under the weather, however I was soon brightened up by his Royal Ryanness fielding straight in front of my seat on the boundary. Thinking that it was the sight of Ryan bending down ( frequently) in front of me that was making my heart beat very very fast I soldiered on Well you would wouldn’t you????.
Day two was wet and horrible and I, Lady Lainey was feeling decidedly poorly, seriously over beating heart, headaches, temperature, the whole flipping lot, so I stayed at home.
Friday saw Mr Funky tip up at the match briefly and sit beside me, whilst I was unable to take any of it in for feeling so ill. I left just after lunch to go home to bed. You can see that I was really ill, to miss one day of the match is bad enough to go home mid way through….welll!!!!!!
Didn’t make Saturday, as even though I was not well I was attending the wedding of cousin The Great Gibson. ( you can’t beat a good wedding, and I had a NEW OUTFIT to wear so that couldn’t go to waste!!!!) and to be honest I wish I had been there to see Joe Root score 182. Top tiny tyke
Result from the match Yorkshire won by 4 wickets……and I Lady lainey totally knocked out with very serious viral infection ( which was to raise its ugly heart beating head again before the season was out).
May saw some good weather and lots of days to enjoy cricket at former besty home county of Durham.
Yorkshire hosted Derbyshire and the one and only Chesney Hughes fell 4 runs short of equalling Derbys highest first class score, I was keeping up on Twitter and sadly he only made 270 (only!!). I am sure that even hardened Yorkshire supporters were egging him on. Great playing though.
It was also the 50th birthday of Mr Funky the Chauffeur and we had a jolly splendid tea watching Durham v Middlesex.
Bank Holiday Monday saw Durham playing Derbyshire, and I was relatively well behaved for a Bank Holiday! OK maybe not that well behaved but I do like wine and Guinness !!!( not in the same glass though)
June started with Yorkshire taking on Nottinghamshire at Scarbados, Mr Funky got thrown off the Christmas card list by saying that we weren’t going!!!!!! So I did a spot of tiling at home. Well it couldn’t be that difficult to do, if boys do it!!!!!
I Lady Lainey managed to get through a few matches without even having a sniff from the wine bottle. ( had a few glugs though!!!!! ‘Job the Jolly’ ).
We also went to watch Durham take on Lancashire and I managed to get a new picture for my (yet unpublished) book ‘Cricketers Posteriors’. Oliver Newby will never want to be Twelfth man again!!!!
July was busy with T20 matches, not a favourite of I Lady Lainey, but any cricket is better than no cricket.
So we turned out to see Durham v Notts on 5th July and then on 12th July on a scorching hot evening we went to see Durham v Yorkshire ( makes a change from the torrential rain that usually happens when Yorkshire come for T20).
I took my seat with Mr Funky and Pauly Paul on the boundary and His Royal Ryanness was only flipping fielding right in front of me, so I whipped out my camera and pointed, well, he turned round and smiled. I got all flustered and nearly dropped my blinking camera!!!!!
The match was a good one. Phil Mustard hit 91 off 52 balls to make Durham’s highest individual T20 score!!!
The end of the month saw I Lady Lainey taking afternoons off from super swanky Lady Lainey office and walking down to Darlington CC to see Durham 2nd XI in action against Leicester 2nd’s. I love 2nd XI cricket, you get to see up and coming cricketers and if you are really lucky (at Darlington) get to sit very close to a rat. (and not be told until after the event!!)
Yorkshire were leading Division one so I was flipping over the moon.
August was going to be a good month. I, Lady Lainey went off to friends birthday celebrations in London on T20 final day (not a good day for former besty home county in the South, Hampshire), met up with besty ex (Hants)bowler friend JJ and by the time I got back to the North of Blighty, the heart racing, temperature spiking, and dizziness was in full flow again..
After much panicking and swallowing of tablets, by the end of the week all seemed to have settled down.
His Royal Ryanness over took Daddy Sidebottom in the wicket taking stakes. Great achievement.
The Bank Holiday saw two days at Chester le Street, with Sunday seeing Lady Lainey very demure and well behaved and then Bank Holiday Monday seeing Lady Lainey and Job the Jolly (whom she had obtained tickets for) drunk as skunks and having a wild old time, only to both suffer for it on Tuesday in super swanky Lady Lainey office.
After getting cheesed off with work, I ,Lady Lainey decamped to Chateau Saltburn and drove everyday to Scarbados for the Scarborough Festival which this year was a showdown………..yes Yorkshire V Durham. I was planning to don my Yorkshire shirt and cheer extra loudly for The Tykes ( well Durham were in the dressing room furthest away from Lady Lainey). I was happily snapping His Royal Ryanness’s posterior when someone sat next to me……………….…….oh no rumbled!!!!! Only Daddy Rushworth, sitting next to Lady Lainey, who was by this time on the fence again!!!
Great days of cricket, amazing number of runs and wickets falling here there and every flipping where, sunshine, seagulls, lots of chocolate,suntan and great company.
This was test match cricket at the seaside!!
Super polite young man Jamie Harrison bowling well, Chris Rushworth bowling brilliantly and his Royal Ryanness, well what more can I say!
Durham won a very hard fought match and I drove back to Saltburn wanting to see the whole match all over again.
High Point of Scarborough Festival
Gillespie the Gallant speaking to me in the street, and me in my sunglasses too, how on earth did he recognise me????? Top bloke, top coach.
And then it was September, time to pack my case to go home to La Belle France for fun and champagne swilling galore with the sister, Dame Didi. This had been booked since last year so I never envisaged what was going to occur!
Mr Funky the chauffeur had sent a text as I arrived in France to say that it was not looking good for my Tykes. Durham were going to be in action at home and the Championship was looking cut and dried.
Thursday 19th September dawned with Dame Didi and I having a little drive out to Challans (‘They have a C & A’- Dame Didi, ‘But is there a bar?’- Lady Lainey)
And then the merde hit the fan as my phone went into melt down, texts, phone calls galore,
‘Do you know that they haven’t started playing yet?’
‘Do you think that this is an omen?’
‘Do you know what time the umpires are doing an inspection?’
For the love of god I was 1,000 miles away and the only thing on my mind was what time the Pastis was being poured! Then I got THE call to say that Durham had done it.
Twitter was in chaos, pictures flooding through and messages of congratulations. Gillespie the Gallant sending a message of congratulations to Durham, which proved what a great sportsman he is.
People tweeting and texting me in my native French tongue!!! Wow I was jolly impressed!!!
Well The Dame and I celebrated the win in the usual French way , getting totally squiffy on the terrace and then invading the neighbours garden crawling commando style over the lawns and spotting naked shower guy ( OK we didn’t really do THAT this year), but we did get jolly squiffy!!!!
His Royal Ryanness confirmed his allegiance to Yorkshire for another couple of seasons meaning that I get more photo opportunities and he gets to try to make 700 first class wickets!.
Durham and Yorkshire had one more match to play the week that I came home from France.
Durham were in Sussex and although they appeared tired ( and probably still hungover) they made a real match of it.. I was kept up to date on all things to do with Brighton, especially cost of ice cream, how nice the cake was, how hot the weather was, ….. Thanks Joe I was cooped up in super swanky Lady Lainey office feeling very sorry for myself.
Yorkshire were down in London taking on Surrey who were already relegated to Division 2 and had not had a great season. However 18 year old player Dom Sibley made the end of the season his own by scoring a double century and being a Surrey history maker.
And then it was over for another year.
Durham were champions, Yorkshire were second (but still my champions), and it had to have been one of the best seasons I, Lady Lainey have had.
Thank you to both counties for making it so exciting!
Lady Lainey’s Champagne moment of the season,
Well it was hard to choose one (and super surprisingly Ryan is not included!!!), so I had to pick two.
Joe Root being hugged by his brother Billy after his test century at Lords #notadryeyeintheTowers
Henry sneezing on his daddy, Chris Rushworth, who was being interviewed after Durham won the County Championship.
After a few weeks of serious nail biting from I Lady Lainey. Gillespie the Gallant confirmed on Twitter that although his initial contract with Yorkshire was for 2 years ( expires 15th November 2013), he is not going anywhere, he is staying!!!
I can hardly wait for next year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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